DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Working on your own project related to the Donkey Kong Country series?
This forum is your place to discuss fangames, artwork, stories and so forth which are DKC relevant.

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » December 14th, 2022, 1:22 pm

What does anyone think of doing a audiobook/radio play of this? That would be an interesting project to bring this world to life. I would make a movie of it, but I don’t have those skills! :parry:

:EDIT: if this project is a go, auditioning for parts will open.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » December 14th, 2022, 4:06 pm

I like the idea, but I'm not sure if I would be a part of it.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » December 14th, 2022, 4:33 pm

Like always, I would love to include you! The question is, is there enough voices? I’ve done projects like to this before, so the editing part wouldn’t be difficult.
:parry:

:EDIT: I have decided that I think I would make a very good Funky and Diddy. I’m not reserving those roles for me, though.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » December 17th, 2022, 3:40 pm

I have decided to start auditions soon. Also, I’m postponing some of the chapter releases for storyline changes. Minor delays expected. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » December 18th, 2022, 5:15 pm

Auditions! PM me the audition with a link or whatever you want!
Here are the open spots! Also, since there are too many kremling breeds, pick one to audition for!
Brash
Kiddy
Screech
Dixie
Krook
Funky
Swanky
Kunning
K.rool
Kaboing
Diddy
DK
Konstrukt
Larry
Yasser
Tiny
Chunky
Mr. X
Krusha
Cranky
Wrinkly
Klubba
Squawks
Enguarde
Rambi
Expresso
Manky Kong
Banana Bird Queen
Arich
Banana Bird(s)
Krow
Squitter
Mayor of the Kongs of Hermit Crab Cove
Narrator

List will be continually updated as I write the story and if I missed one that’s already written let me know! I’m auditioning for Diddy, Wrinkly, Funky, and Kiddy! I will not bias any of the auditions in my favor. I might be able to get Yasser Seirawan in this play, not that he would be interested in DKC, I believe he has told this story so I could isolate his voice. With his permission. I do actually know him.
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » December 22nd, 2022, 11:55 pm

Technically, I've finished chapters 17 through 20. I've just haven't found the time to type out my drafts onto the computer. Hope you understand! I'm still going to try my hardest to find time to do that. Also, the project mentioned above, probably can't happen for numerous reasons. parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 21st, 2023, 5:03 pm

Chapter 17 is almost out! I decided to take a short break from studying for the tournament in february to get this done. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 28th, 2023, 5:10 pm

The Kremlings Revenge
Chapter 17 The Jagged Jungle

Spoiler!
"Please don't kill me! I'm begging you!" said a frightened kritter in the claws of some terrible beast.
"Not until you tell me what you are doing here!" the bird said with a growl.
"I told you my story already!" said Kritter.
"Well, I don't believe it!" the fearsome bird said.
"Krow! Don't kill the messenger!" said Kritter.
"I want to know the truth!" said Krow.
"I told you already! Zed the Zinger, who K.rool appointed to govern Crocodile Isle while he was invading DK island, figured out how to free you from the bonds of this ship! He didn't have the guts to go himself! So, he sent me instead! Please don't kill me!" said Kritter.
"What's the idea?" hissed Krow, clearly intrigued, "I'm listening."
"Somehow, you were bonded to this shipwreck in death! He has a way of freeing you! So you are free to go about your revenge!" said Kritter.
"What's in it for you?" asked Krow.
As she said this, her grip closed in tighter.
"He wants to go up in the Kaptain's favor. He had this plan after he remembered that you didn't aktually die. You know, in the sekond boss fight. You died in the first," said Kritter.
"I know," said Krow, choking him, "You go tell him that I am interested. Tell this, Zinger, I would be happy to avenge myself and my baby birds."
"Good idea," said Kritter with a cough, "Kould you please let me go now?"
"I have a change of plans. I will tell him myself. Therefore, you won't be needed," said Krow slyly.
Krow released her grip on him. Then she picked him up and took off. At a sufficient height, according to Krow's opinion. This was thirty feet above the topsail, where he was previously pinned down. Then she dropped him.
"Aaah!!" said Kritter, screaming.
Crack.
...
Dixie and Kiddy were exploring the Greenleaf Grove. DK, although he remembered all of them, DK didn't remember everything else. Besides, after all that adventuring, he needed time to rest and recuperate. Right now, Diddy was keeping an eye on him. Over in Greenleaf Grove, Kiddy was mesmerized by the sights and sounds of the enchanted forest. Also, Kiddy was chasing butterflies. Dixie was before, sitting in the flowers and taking in the smells and sights. Now, Dixie was slowly strolling and exploring the forest. Birdsong filled the air. Dixie was surprised that the enchanted forest environment existed on DK Island.
"I thought only Crocodile Isle contained this kind of forest! Well, that is a pleasant surprise," Dixie said cheerily.
Dixie started thinking about Crocodile Isle and the Kremlings. Dixie knew about the sinking of Crocodile Isle. All of the biodiverse habitats that resided there were desolated. Nowadays, Crocodile Isle is a desolate land, mainly devoid of life. Except for the sparsely populated kremlings that imported all of their food. K.rool lived at K.rool's Keep out of tradition when he resided on Crocodile Isle. Before the invasion of DK Island. But it was a hassle because no food could be grown there anymore. Dixie understood the reason why the kremlings needed to occupy DK Island. They needed to sustain themselves. Which could not be done in their homeland. We despise them for their war-like and filthy way of living. A barbaric way of life. So we were happy to destroy their land. That's biting us back right now. Now they are here to corrupt our island. Dixie knew of the historical accounts of Crocodile Isle. Then, it was called Kremling Isle. Then, it was as rich and as beautiful as DK Island. The kremlings degraded it over time, and we finished it off. Destroying the one sustaining life source there. DK was kidnapped, but we didn't need to go that far. There are pros and cons to destroying it. It set back the kremlings considerably with the destruction of Crocodile Isle. But anyway, we have to keep the kremlings from occupying DK Island and mar it. There are some acceptable kremlings like Kunning. But I think he thinks the kremlings can be reformed. Not all kremlings can be changed. Neither should we destroy the kremlings for not habilitating themselves. Kunning cannot change the culture and habits of the kremlings in his lifetime. It would take a hundred of his lifetimes. But it would be good having him as the leader. But, one leader would undo all of his good work. And it is unlikely that the kremlings would let him change things, to begin with...
"Dixie! Look! In front of us!" said Kiddy.
A sparkling river was flowing in front of them.
"Don't drink it! We're in an enchanted forest! Have you not heard the tales of the streams that bring forgetfulness and drowsiness?" said Dixie.
"Dixie! You're silly! We're not in one of those forests! But I will heed your cautioning," said Kiddy leaping onto a log in the middle of the river.
From there, he jumped to the land. Then, Kiddy rolled through a Knik-Knak and picked up the K.
"Dixie! See, I got the K!" said Kiddy.
"Great job!" Dixie said as she applauded.
"I rolled through some more Knik-Knaks!" said Kiddy.
"Is there a bonus room up there?" asked Dixie, hinting there was.
"I think so!" said Kiddy.
Grabbing a barrel, Kiddy tossed it at Spiny. This cleared the above platform of enemies. Kiddy leaped up onto the cleared platform. Then he jumped again into the treetops. And after exploring the trees, he found the well-concealed bonus room.
"I see it!" said Kiddy jumping on Gnawty, pacing back and forth on a tree branch.
"What's the objective?" asked Dixie.
"Collect 15 bananas!" said Kiddy.
Kiddy completed the objective and collected the Kremcoin as he exited the chamber. Outside it, there was a banana in the middle of an abysm.
"Ooh! A banana! I'll roll jump for it!" said Kiddy.
"Kiddy, wait. I think it may mark a secret," Dixie said, eyeing the pit.
"I'll slap you in! You can hover down now!" said Kiddy.
"Thank you," said Dixie as Kiddy slapped her in.
Dixie began to hover down into the chasm. Another banana indicated that there was a hole in the otherwise solid walls. Dixie maneuvered into the gap and felt the muddy ground beneath her feet. In front of her was a reward for finding the secret path. Some banana bunches, a banana coin, and two lives were plenty of rewards for Dixie.
"See what would've happened if you had just roll-jumped past the chasm? It wasn't just a banana laid askew. What you almost skipped was a secret path! I would presume that this leads to a bonus room. You should hone your senses of detecting secrets, Kiddy," said Dixie.
"Ok! Let's go on!" said Kiddy.
Dixie knew that Kiddy didn't care about honing his skills that much. Dixie rolled through three Sneeks, then she jumped down into lower terrain. Dixie realized that she was just past an abyss. It was right behind her. But now she had to watch for that Slippa up ahead. Dixie whipped her ponytail around to kill the Slippa and spun twice more to eliminate two more Sneeks. Dixie realized that they were in a maze of underground, interconnected tunnels. In the tunnels, a green light was shining throughout. The tunnels were lit with super-sized phosphorescent fungi. Dixie was intrigued because of every tale or story she'd heard. There was no mention of bioluminescent mushrooms anywhere. From Cranky's adventures to Diddy and DK's adventures, there was no mention of many of the species she had discovered during this adventure. She learned during writing her book that Cranky had given names to all of the kremling breeds he had found. Cranky's expeditions had been to map the island and learn of its inhabitants. Cranky gave the names he came up with for each kremling breed. These are the ones that are used today. The kremlings used to have their own breed names. While they still had individual languages. Sometime during the interregnum of the kongs, the common tongue, or the dialect of the kremlings, the kommon tongue, took control.
Dixie broke out of pensive thought.
Dixie said, "I'm happy to know there is still more to explore! And that we don't know everything."
"I'm happy too!" said Kiddy.
"Of course you are! You're always happy!" said Dixie.
Eventually, the two of them arrived at what seemed to be a central meeting point of all the tunnels.
"This looks purposely made! I wonder who built them?" said Dixie.
"I don't know!" said Kiddy.
The large epicenter of the tunnels had light shining in from above. And the blue sky. Circling the room were stairs or ledges carved into the wall.
"How does it stay up? Dirt's not that sturdy," said Dixie.
"Maybe it's rock?" asked Kiddy.
Dixie stamped her foot down, "Could be. I think it is! That makes me feel a lot more secure than standing on dirt."
Dixie and Kiddy started walking on the stairs, cautiously at first, but as they circled around the chamber as the platforms went up, they realized that it was soil covering solid rock. Plants were growing out of the nooks and crannies of the steps. And in some areas with exposed rock, there was lichen as well.
"Surely, the kremlings couldn't have built this!" said Dixie.
"Well, they sure found a way in! Could it be a trap? Maybe those bananas were to lure us in?" asked Kiddy.
"I doubt it," said Dixie.
The orthocenter of all the tunnels was at least a hundred feet underground. By the time they got to the top, Kiddy and Dixie's feet were tired by the time they were at the top. For the last bit, where the stairs had crumbled away, Dixie barely managed to toss Kiddy the required height. Soon enough after that, they were at the save point. Immediately after that, they saw a Rambi Animal Crate.
"Woohoo! Rambi's back!" said Kiddy, clearly excited.
"I can see!" said Dixie.
"Can I ride him?" asked Kiddy.
"Sure thing!" said Dixie.
Dixie slapped Kiddy in, which involved Kiddy yanking her by her hair. Not an entirely pleasant experience, but if Kiddy legitimately did slap in, that would hurt. DK preferred a high five instead. And not a staggering slap.
"Hello, Kiddy. Hello, Dixie," said Rambi in his deep voice.
"Hi, Rambi!" said Kiddy.
"How was your day?" asked Dixie.
"Well, I was eating grass and some moist foliage from trees. When I spotted a particularly tasty-looking bite of leaves. Next thing I know, I'm trapped in this crate!" said Rambi.
"So, was it good or bad?" asked Dixie.
"Well, I would've preferred helping you another day. But you guys must have pressed your button to cage me up. So, duty calls!" said Rambi.
"What button? We don't do anything. You just suddenly show up out of the blue in a crate!" said Dixie.
"Hmm. Suspicious! But that's a mystery for another day! We have kremlings to charge! Kremlings to kill!" said Rambi.
Kiddy, Rambi, and Dixie traversed the rest of the level. Kiddy wanted to explore the tree with Rambi.
"Uhh, are you sure, little monkey?" asked Rambi.
"Yeah, that might not be a great idea. Perhaps reconsider?" asked Dixie skeptically.
With a few hops, Rambi reached the top of the tree.
"See, you did it! Now supercharge!" said Kiddy.
"What? You want me to break my neck?" asked Rambi.
"Are you sure, little monkey?" Dixie said, laughing.
After supercharging from the apex of the tree, they found that Cranky had hidden a DK coin in an otherwise impossible-to-reach ledge on top of a cliff. Which, Rambi said earlier, despite the finding of the DK coin, it was completely not worth it.
"But we're going for 104%!" said Kiddy.
"That was an entirely unpleasant, humiliating, and embarrassing experience. It was a massive blow to my dignity. Rhinos aren't supposed to climb trees!" said Rambi.
After recovering the DK coin, there was no choice but to go underground again. The way was lit by the same bioluminescent mushrooms. This time the paths were very claustrophobic. But before long, they reached another epicenter of underpasses.
"Is it the same one? There are the stairs, too!" said Kiddy.
"I hope not," said Dixie.
"How is Rambi going to get up there?" asked Kiddy.
"I'd rather go up on my own accord," said Rambi.
"Well, that's settled," said Dixie.
Kiddy and Dixie ascended the winding carven stairs. Near the top, Dixie noticed that the staircase was complete.
"That's a relief!" said Dixie, "It's not the same one!"
"Did I mention I have arachnophobia," said Rambi looking down.
"That's fear of spiders, Rambi! I think you have a fear of heights!" said Dixie.
"Same old. Same old," said Rambi.
"Yeah, right!" said Dixie.
"Are you sure Squitter's not down there?" asked Kiddy.
"Yes," said Dixie.
"I haven't seen Squitter in a long time, so I haven't seen him here," said Rambi.
"Well, if it's all the same to you, I would like to get out of here!" said Dixie. The three laughed, or rather, Rambi hooted, and Dixie and Kiddy laughed. Then Kiddy, Dixie, and Rambi made it out of the tunnels. And soon enough, there was a "No Rhino" sign.
"Too bad!" said Kiddy.
"Goodbye!' said Rambi.
In return, Kiddy and Dixie received a banana bunch.
...
After finding a hidden banana bunch in a tree and jumping off a Flitter to clear an abyss of a chasm, Kiddy jumped on the end target and received a life balloon for his efforts. After exiting the level, there was a big building in front of them labeled Barrel Flights.
"Funky's Flights!" said Kiddy, "Let's go see him!"
Dixie and Kiddy entered the door to see an oil-stained ape stick his head out of the engine compartment of a plane.
"Hey, dudes! Come to see me again? Well, my plane is working, but I can't guarantee your safety if you choose to take Barrel Flights!" said Funky.
At this moment, the plane, previously spitting out oil and some kind of greenish liquid, started spitting fire. Luckily, Funky, sensing the danger, jumped out of the way just in time to avoid being scorched.
"Yeah, I'll have to fix that," he said.
"Are your boats working?" asked Kiddy.
"They're working good as new! Don't tell anybody, but I'm working on a top-secret, and super cool invention! Let me tell you! Let me know when you guys have found all of the old man Cranky's Video Game Hero Coins!" said Funky.
"What is it?" asked Kiddy.
"Now, that would be telling. But it would come in handy to cap off any adventure!" said Funky.
"Well, we will certainly come back when we've found all of the coins!" said Dixie.
"I just remembered! Sorry for being so late! You know, I got the news! Wrinkly told me! And I'm here to help!" Funky said.
"Help with what?" asked Dixie.
"You know! DK and Diddy are missing again! You know, this totally reminded me of the last time they went missing!" said Funky.
"That's what I thought too!" said Dixie.
"But, KAOS is destroyed, so not entirely the same," said Funky.
"You're right. I was no less worried," said Dixie.
"I didn't say you weren't. I remember when you squeezed through the doors of my rentals. You asked me about how long this was going on. That was in reference to my motorboat workshop. I said, not bad, huh? Then I said, only just set up here. You gotta expand if you're gonna succeed! Right? Then you said. It at least keeps me out of trouble, unlike those other two. Then I said. Whoa, I think I can guess what you mean! Those two love getting in way over their heads. Then you asked me if I knew where they were. I didn't, of course. Then I said, Dix, if you're goin' after them, you might want some help. Then I whistled behind me for Kiddy! When I realized he wasn't behind me anymore, I said. Hey kid! Aw, where have you gone now? Then Kiddy blew out of the cupboard door in my bookshelf! I remember that he rolled over to you. I mean, you two are cousins. So it must've been instinctual or something. Then he unrolled at your feet. I think he started giggling at you was that you were sopping wet. I haven't seen those books on my bookshelf since! I suppose he ate them. Sounds like something he'd do," said Funky.
"What?!" said Kiddy.
"Of course, he thought I looked ridiculous!" said Dixie laughing.
"I have absolutely no memory of what you guys are talking about!" said Kiddy.
"You were very little," said Dixie.
"Well, not so very little, but you know what Dixie means," said Funky laughing.
"I would be surprised if you did remember everything," said Dixie.
"Anyway, I said. Meet Kiddy! And I informed you that he was your cousin! I also said that it would be fun to bring him along. Since I wasn't cut out for babysitting. Anyway, you definitely needed his help. And you sure took way better care of him than I ever did. And he stopped eating my books," said Funky.
"Except for the fact that I took him into life-threatening danger!" said Dixie dramatically.
"He was fine, though. I think he even enjoyed it! Didn't you, Kiddy. I remember him telling me that his favorite stage was Lemguin Lunge," said Funky.
"I don't remember if I did or not," said Kiddy scrunching his face into a pensive expression.
"I shouldn't have expected that you would," said Funky.
"I do remember Baron Kroolstein getting smashed by that bird's egg. And Cranky waterskiing," said Kiddy.
Funky raised one eyebrow, "That doesn't sound like Cranky. I don't think he did."
"Actually, he latched onto your boat!" said Dixie.
"He did? Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle! You learn something new every day! Cranky's not as old and feeble as I thought!" said Funky, "Maybe wizened is the correct word for him."
"Or wisened!" said Kiddy.
"I gave in to Kiddy because I couldn't resist the wide-eyed little nipper. He was dribbling happily all over my foot!" said Dixie.
"What? I don't remember that," said Kiddy.
"You don't remember when you were a wide-eyed little nipper?" asked Dixie.
"No!" said Kiddy becoming more and more confused.
"Well, my plane is out-of-order. But you could use one of my boats to find Diddy and DK!" said Funky.
"I found them the other day," said Dixie airily.
"That's great! Of course, I knew you would, but I thought it would be nice if I helped you," said Funky.
"Don't feel bad, Funky. But we should go! Right, Kiddy?" asked Dixie.
"What? Oh, yes. We should leave," said Kiddy.
"See ya later!" said Funky.
"Goodbye!" said Dixie.
"Bye!" said Kiddy.
...
"I'm bored! Why do you have to keep me cooped up here!" said DK.
"You have to stay out of trouble! Dixie's orders!" said Diddy.
"Since when do you follow Dixie's orders?!" said DK.
Diddy ignored his snide remark.
"Because there have been rumors that you're dreaded nemesis, Krash, is on the hunt for you again! And you know how that goes!" said Diddy.

(Krash vs. DK is a DKCplayer thing. It was a running joke in his DKC bloopers series.)

"He actually krashed into me in Gangplank Galleon!" said DK.
"Haha. Krash crashed into you with a k? But anyway you've told me this story before. And I still don't believe you," said Diddy getting annoyed.
"I have video proof! Go ask K.rool!" said DK.
"I'm not asking K.rool for anything! He's kidnapped you twice and me twice!" said Diddy.
"I'm dying to get outside, Diddy. The one thing I fear the most is a cage. I want to go outside. I want to smell the bananas, and feel the cool breeze! And I can't do that in the treehouse.
"I'll see what I can do," said Diddy.
He unlocked the door of the treehouse and leaped out. Diddy grabbed a banana bunch that was mysteriously hanging mid-air. And he headed back to the treehouse. The treehouse the two of them had found was identical to the one in Jungle Hijinxes, only it was in the Jagged Jungle. It was so similar. When they first saw it, DK and Diddy thought they had gotten themselves hopelessly lost. Well, as lost as you can be in your own house. As Diddy jumped up the stairs engraved into the tree trunk, he had a niggling suspicion that DK had flown the coop while he was gone. To his immense relief, he found that this wasn't the case, and DK was still in the stuffy treehouse. Diddy ran up and presented the banana bunch to DK.
"Thanks for the effort, little buddy! I know you tried!" said DK.
"There's more coming!" said Diddy as he licked his finger as the wind blew through the door.
Diddy stuck his head and finger out the door and figured out the wind was coming from the east. Diddy unlocked and opened the corresponding window. Suddenly, a blast of muggy air shot through the treehouse. Then a cold, refreshing breeze flooded the treehouse.
"Now, is that better?" asked Diddy.
"Thanks for trying, Diddy. But I don't think it will content me. It's just not the same. Have you noticed that this treehouse is entirely devoid of objects? Nothing to tell us about the kong who lived here," said DK.
"Maybe the owner is a spy. That seems like something a spy would do," said Diddy.
"Probably not. But what confuses me is why the door was unlocked. That's a foolish decision in this jungle. Whether you're a kong or a kremling," said DK.
"Don't worry about it," said Diddy.
"Why can't we go to Wrinkly's for tea? It's about time for that," said DK.
Diddy thought for a moment. Yes, that seemed a safe enough endeavor. And it would keep DK occupied.
Diddy finally responded, "I'll consent to that. It keeps you out of trouble, as per Dixie's orders. But you have to mind your manners."
"I will! This is great! What are we waiting for? Let's go!" said DK.
Diddy unlocked the front door again of the treehouse. And in one bound, he was at the bottom. DK decided to do the same, thereby skipping the steps down. The walk towards Wrinkly's Save Cave was pleasant. Once they got out from underneath the canopy, a crisp cold wind from the north prevailed. Once they got to Wrinkly's Cave, they saw that Wrinkly was playing Diddy Kong Racing.
"Wrinkly!" said Diddy.
Wrinkly shot up from her rocking chair. As she did so, she "accidentally" knocked the reset button.
"Diddy! I didn't see you there!" said Wrinkly.
"Why was I at the starting line?" Diddy asked.
"Maybe because I wanted to beat you for once?" said Wrinkly.
"What were you, Wrinkly?" asked DK.
"Tiptup, of course! And, of course, Diddy was himself!" said Wrinkly.
"Ha! That's funny!" said DK.
"Well, the three best are Tiptup, Timber, and Diddy!" Diddy said, "I was the best choice left."
"What about T.T? But of course, it's still funny!" DK said.
Behind them, a kettle began to whistle.
"That'll be tea! Let me get it! Would you prefer bananas or biscuits?" asked Wrinkly.
"Cookies," said Diddy deciding for DK.
"What about both? Diddy's been starving me for years! Bread and water for breakfast! Stale bread and water for lunch. Very stale bread and rancid water for dinner! I'm so miserable!" said DK.
"He's exaggerating," said Diddy.
"I assumed as such. Dear, do you mean biscuits, though," said Wrinkly.

:EDITOR's NOTE: Since when did Diddy Americanize himself?

There was a clinking sound and then a pouring noise.
"Yes," said Diddy.
"What? Speak up, dear. I can't hear you," said Wrinkly.
"Yes, please!" said Diddy.
"Thank you," said Wrinkly coming over with a tray.
She put a cup in front of them. Then her own. Then she took the lid off of the container of cookies and put it on the table. Wrinkly set the example by sipping her tea quietly and holding her pinkie finger out. Diddy, remembering his manners, stuck his finger out as well. DK picked it up and took a little sip to test the temperature. When he found it was drinkable, he threw his head back and poured it down his throat. Wrinkly was horrified! Diddy coughed and spat up tea.
"Manners! Or have you forgotten them? This is supposed to be a pleasant social time! Not the annual chug-a-thon!" said Wrinkly.
"There is?" DK said with surprise.
"In fact, he has!" said Diddy, quickly coming to his defense, "Among other things, I might add," said Diddy glancing at DK.
"In fact, what?" said Wrinkly looking disapprovingly at DK.
"He's recovering from amnesia," said Diddy.
"Well, I could make an exception for that. But I'm not serving him more tea," said Wrinkly.
"I'm getting summoned! Someone broke a DK barrel! Keep an eye on him while I'm gone!" said Diddy holding onto his chair.
"Well, off you pop," said Wrinkly.
When Diddy disappeared, DK said, "So, have you heard about Donkey Kong Racing?"
"No, I haven't. Tell me more!" said Wrinkly.
...
Diddy teleported to inside a level. Dixie was participating in a battle with an insanely high-jumping Gnawty. A sign informed Diddy that he was in Insanely Gnawty's Lair.
"Well, That clears things up!" said Diddy.
"Diddy! Come help!" said Dixie.
"Where's Kiddy!" asked Diddy.
"He took damage and left me here to face off against. Well, this beast! At the start, there were options to fight, defend, buy, etcetera. But Kiddy threw caution to the wind and took him on! At least, I assume that he's a he. I advised Kiddy, at the very least, to stock up on some banana peel armor," said Dixie.
"Is it possible to do so now?" asked Diddy.
"I don't think so," said Dixie.
"Then let's give him all we've got!" said Diddy.
The two of them continually jumped on the Insane Gnawty at the same time until he finally gave out. By the end, they were panting and exhausted.
"That banana peel armor could've come in handy," said Diddy.
"And only one measly Kremkoin for our efforts!" said Dixie.
...
Eventually, they got to Cranky's Cabin.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite boyfriend and girlfriend!" said Cranky, "Did that obnoxious Funky Kong tell you where I was? Oh, and I gave that gnawty a lot of coffee this morning. Just kidding!"
"You always tease us about being boyfriend and girlfriend, Cranky! You know we're just inseparable friends!" said Diddy.
"Yah, yah. And I'm just a monkey's uncle!
"DK jr. didn't have a brother," said Dixie.
"That's the point! Well, you two look plain tired out! Well, that gnawty's fierce. I'll give you that. He nearly had my hide when I beat him to get over here!" said Cranky.
"Any useful words of advice?" asked Diddy.
"He's just going to give us snarky comments. Or confusing riddles!" said Dixie.
"Actually, here's a useful tidbit. I've heard that K.rool left a viceroy in charge of Crocodile Isle. Trouble is, Krow usurped, which is to say, killed him. Word on the street is that she's coming for you, Dixie!" said Cranky.
"I thought she was dead!" said Dixie.
"Apparently not," said Cranky.
"I thought we finished her off once and for all!" Dixie said, "The question is, how did she escape from the shipwreck that she was eternally bound to?"
"Well, apparently she did. And it doesn't really matter how. Dixie, always keep an eye behind you. And depending on how cunning Krow is, she might try to hold hostage any of us. So, Diddy, I recommend the same," said Cranky.
"Well, this could be trouble for us," said Diddy.
"Anyways, you should probably hurry either way," said Cranky.
"Ok," said Diddy.
As they left, Cranky shouted out, "See you later, Alligator!"
...
"Treetop Town! That was the name of a level in Vine Valley!" said Diddy.
"I doubt it's the same level, though," said Dixie.
"There's a gnawty in front of you!" said Diddy.
"I see it," said Dixie as she whipped her ponytail around.
The gnawty squeaked and dramatically dropped dead. But the two of them proceeded through the level when Diddy had an epiphany.
"Dixie! I've just had an apostrophe!" said Diddy.
"I think you mean an epiphany," said Dixie.
"Lightning had just struck my brain!" said Diddy.
"Well, that must have hurt," said Dixie nonchalantly, "What's your idea?"
"There's a reason Cranky is the best of the best! I mean, he taught me all I know!" said DK.
"What about DK?" asked Dixie.
"My video game hero training from him? He didn't teach me that much. Anyway, Cranky taught speedrunners all they know!" said Diddy.
"Or maybe it's the other way around," said Dixie thinking of V0oid's channel.
"Who knows. Cranky taught me how to do an SJR!" said Diddy.
"An S-J what?" asked Dixie.
"An SJR! A super jump roll! See, there's a straight cliff right there! Take damage as a kremling comes down on you as you hug the wall. Instead of running away, you will shoot up into the air! Break open a DK barrel and you have an infinite jump stored up. Then take damage. Land on the kremling that killed you as you're coming down, and execute a jump roll by pressing Y and one direction! This is frame perfect. You should start shooting in one direction! The more kremlings you roll through, the more speed and height you gain! Eventually, you should be shooting across and off the screen at a million miles an hour! Let's try it!" said Diddy.
The two monkeys correctly executed the trick, and Dixie started spinning wildly through the air. In two seconds, Dixie was above and beyond the screen. She only lost elevation when she smashed into the level's right wall. Falling down, she went to the left. Then she lightly tapped on the end target and exited the level.
"I'm dizzy. Dizzy enough to puke," said Dixie to herself.
Then she fainted. She fell over and knew no more.
...
"Reptile ruins!" said Diddy."
"I think these are the temples that Kunning was investigating!" said Dixie as she crossed a rickety rope bridge over a ravine.
"Those?!" said Diddy.
"The one and the same!" said Dixie.
"Interesting," said Diddy.
"There's a lot of traps hidden here!" said Dixie.
"I'll make sure to avoid them," said Diddy.
"I'm still dizzy from that super jump roll. How do you survive it?" asked Dixie.
"I used to pass out immediately in the middle of one," said Diddy.
"I passed out after one finished," said Dixie.
"Ah, well, you get used to it," said Diddy.
"Remember to use caution here. There are traps everywhere. I'm repeating this so you remember it. Kunning told me that he is trying to study the ruins. But the snares are making that particularly difficult. Kunning said he's been defusing the traps. Apparently, some of them are quite gory," said Dixie.
"Ok, I'll throw caution to the wind, if that's what you want me to do," said Diddy giggling, "No need to be so serious!"
Suddenly, Diddy felt a tripwire trip him. There was a click.
"Diddy. Don't move," said Dixie.
...
DK and Kiddy headed toward the mysterious treehouse. What disturbed them the most was that although Diddy had locked the door behind him, it was now wide open.
"You know, that doesn't look good," said DK, "Maybe you should go first."
"I'm your bodyguard! Of course, I go first!" said Kiddy.
"Cranky didn't mean for you to be my protector. He meant for you to keep me from escaping!" said DK.
"Same time, then," said Kiddy.
"Ok, I'll proceed up the ladder first. I'll stay on one side of the door. Kiddy, you take the other side. Then we both charge in!" said DK.
"Do we head that with yelling charge?" asked Kiddy.
"No, that would give us away," said DK.
"Ok. Your plan sounds good! Let's do this!" said Kiddy.
DK and Kiddy got to their positions.
"1! 2! 3!" both of them said at the same time.
Then they charged in. As soon as they entered the door frame, a figure swung down from above and knocked them both out.
An hour or two later, give or take an hour, both of them came to. Kiddy ceased being unconscious a minute before DK. Their assailant had tied them up from head to toe. Kiddy realized that they were both gagged. Their hands were tied, and their feet and arms were. And wrapped from head to toe with thick, fibrous rope. On top of that, they were shackled to the wall. When Kiddy opened his eyes, he immediately saw Tiny eating an apple at the table in front of them.
"Psst. Tiny. Could you help us here?" whispered Kiddy, "Someone tied us up. They could be back any moment! And who's treehouse is this?"
"Correction! I tied you up!" said Tiny.
"What? Get us out of here!" said Kiddy.
DK began to stir.
"This should teach you a lesson. You were attempting to sneak up on me. I heard you coming from a mile away! You really don't know the meaning of stealth," said Tiny.
"Tiny! Let us go!" said DK.
"That's not happening. I need something for K.rool to be satisfied," said Tiny, "He has a company of kremlings at a rendezvous point for the handoff."
"What? What are you saying!" said DK, "Whose side are you on?"
"No one," said Tiny.
"Is this your treehouse?" asked DK.
"Yes! Where do you think I was when I wasn't in the Kongo Jungle?" said Tiny.
"Off adventuring," said Kiddy.
"This treehouse is unknown to everybody except Squitter and Chunky, and me. K.rool, Kunning, the whole lot! They don't even know it exists! It was a center of operations for planning between Chunky, Squitter, and me. Now it is a center of operations for furthering K.rool's plans! I have a cart that would be perfect to transport you two!" said Tiny.
Tiny unlocked the chains attached to their necks. Then she rolled them out the treehouse balcony. They fell into the wagon below.
"Ow!" said DK.
"Tiny! There could've been straw!" said Kiddy.
...
"We can't stand here forever!" said Diddy.
"Ok, slowly untrip the wire. Hopefully, the trap doesn't work anymore. Oh, and fast as you can, run away!" said Dixie.
Diddy moved. There was a sharp twanging noise. Dixie watched for something in front of her. Then a hand shot out from the upper floor of the adjacent temple and caught it. The hand was scaly, obviously a kremling. But who?
"That would've hit your neck," said Dixie, "I analyzed the trajectory."
"Who saved me?" asked Diddy.
"Maybe, Kunning. I don't know," said Dixie.
The two of them proceeded through the reptile ruins with only one more incident. Dixie stepped on a trapped tile. Diddy pulled her back just in time. The area around the tile exploded into a self-annihilating vortex of fire which destroyed everything around it.
"Gory, right?" Diddy said.
Dixie wondered why the kremlings had set so many traps. As night fell, and they exited the ruins, they decided to set up a campfire and make some banana leaf hammocks to sleep on. Their spot was just outside the ruins. After that was all complete, Dixie decided to keep watch as Diddy dozed. They would oscillate in a few hours. The last thing Diddy heard before he went to sleep was the crackling fire.

The long awaited chapter. I hope everyone remembers the previous chapters. I've forgotten some! :parry: Also, it may not be noticeable yet, but I felt like my writing quality was going down. Just keep an eye out for it for now. Please let me know if you do notice anything. Thanks!
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » January 29th, 2023, 10:40 am

I'm not sure if your writing quality is degrading, but this story was very detailed. Later on, I might try to write more, but for now, thanks for sharing this with us.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 29th, 2023, 11:20 am

Ok. I'm known for being hyper-critical to myself. Thanks, Super Luigi, for tthe second opinion. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » January 29th, 2023, 3:05 pm

You're welcome. Now, here's a short story that turned out better than I envisioned it. I hope it helps.

Game Night
Spoiler!
Chunky, Donkey, and Funky sat at the table playing card games with Swanky. Since there wasn't any money or bananas on the line, the game show host didn't try to cheat once. For hours, the four men played every type of card game imaginable, and although they didn't understand the rules most of the time, that made their session even more entertaining. Eventually, the group decided to create their own game with several decks of cards, and they erupted into raucous laughter quite often.

Meanwhile, Wrinkly invited Diddy, Dixie, and Tiny to join her on the Nintendo 64 only a few feet away. Of course, the bunch decided to play Donkey Kong 64 first, but instead of fighting each other, they claimed the different colored sections of each map for themselves and pretended to further the story. Soon, they were flying down the tracks in Diddy Kong Racing, and Wrinkly showcased her skills shooting trickshots in Goldeneye's multiplayer, much to her grandchildrens' amazement. With all of the cheats unlocked as well, the group had a wild time together.

Although few really understood him, Cranky watched all of this from the shadows with a sly smile on his face, for he was the true gaming master, although that was for another time. Since everyone present has earned his trust as well, even Swanky, he had decided against embarrassing them all. In truth, however, the old ape wasn't really as angry as he appeared, and his family secretly knew it.

The End.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 29th, 2023, 3:31 pm

Nice! I liked it! Swanky's lawyer got his charges dropped! Or maybe in your story he didn't get sent to court for it. Either way, I really liked it. Also, are you saying that Cranky would put them all to shame? I think so. I think that is what would probably happen.
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » January 30th, 2023, 4:50 am

Cranky will likely always be the best, although a few others can match him, like Wrinkly with the N64.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 30th, 2023, 7:54 am

Ok, chapter 18 is almost out. Since it is a quick release, no preview. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » January 30th, 2023, 4:54 pm

The Kremlings Revenge
Chapter 18 Krow's Kongquest
Spoiler!
As Diddy dozed, Dixie kept watch. In front of her, a shadow crept forward, unknown to her. Unseen and making not a sound. Silently and efficiently. Kunning crept forward to within two feet of Dixie's nose.
Then he burst out with a greeting, "Keeping hydrated?"
Dixie was startled out of drinking her juice.
"What? Who goes there?!" said Dixie.
What startled Dixie the most was that the voice was right in front of her. Kunning, at this point, revealed himself.
"Hello, Dixie. You didn't recognize my voice?" asked Kunning.
"No," said Dixie.
"What were you doing anyway?" said Kunning.
Kunning eyed her juice box, "Bored, I see?"
"I was keeping watch," said Dixie putting away her juice box, "I might as well ask what you were doing here."
"Well, I snuck up on you fairly easily. And there are more nefarious things out there than me. I would suggest you pay more attention. Keep an eye out, anyway," said Kunning.
"You dodged the question," said Dixie annoyed that she had fallen for a trick like that.
"I come with dire news," said Kunning, "But let me finish what I was saying."
"I seriously doubt that anyone could pull a trick like that. Other than you. Not a mouse has ever crept past me before!" said Dixie.
"Well, I just did," said Kunning as if he had just performed a remarkable achievement.
"I agree that I need to pay more attention, Kunning. But that doesn't mean you come over and scare the wits out of me," said Dixie.
"For that, I apologize," said Kunning.
"How did you get past me anyway?" asked Dixie.
"Oh, I just crept along quietly. You know," said Kunning.
"You reference every book on the planet," said Dixie.
"Maybe reading every book on the planet helped?" said Kunning.
"What is the dire news, Kunning. I would like to keep this conversation on track," said Dixie.
"Krow escaped the bonds of the shipwreck and is coming for you!" said Kunning, "After the stunt that I pulled on you, you are certainly at risk."
"Cranky already told me," said Dixie.
"He did? That's good!" said Kunning.
"Anything else?" said Dixie.
"Nope, that's it! If you need me, I'll be on the other side of the creek! I'll be investigating the temples, of course," said Kunning.
"Have you found anything interesting yet?" asked Dixie.
"Yes. I have some theories, but nothing I can prove. Yet," said Kunning.
"It could be invaluable for my book," said Dixie.
"Well, I've got to go!" said Kunning.
"Goodbye!" said Dixie.
"Stay hydrated, by the way!" said Kunning.
"Thanks! I'll remember that!" said Dixie.
"Ok!" said Kunning.
"Wait! Was that you with the arrow?" asked Dixie.
"What arrow?" asked Kunning.
"The arrow that... Oh, never mind," said Dixie.
"Wait, I'm interested! You've got me hooked now!" said Kunning.
"It's not crucial. Diddy's alive anyhow," said Dixie.
"Oh! That arrow! The arrow to the neck trap! Very run of the mill! I had one of my kremling hands grab it," said Kunning.
"You have kremling hands lying around? Or do you mean assistants," said Dixie.
"I have mechanical kremling hands, of course! Of course, I now realize it isn't that obvious," said Kunning, "Anything else?"
"I just remembered! What happened to the kongs in the Kongo Jungle? You know, the ships? The bad weather?" asked Dixie.
"I told them it was in their best interests to stay alive and move to somewhere less exposed. They realized what I meant," said Kunning, " Or at least Cranky explained the situation. They finished evacuating last week. K.rool will be furious when he realizes his plan didn't work. He won't find out for months, though. When the ships finally arrive at the Kongo Jungle, the weather patterns will have shifted, meaning it will be optimal to head back the way they came. But much shorter is inherently heading back the way the weather denies. Either way, you may have beaten K.rool already."
"Perhaps," said Dixie.
"I better be going now," said Kunning.
"You already said that. But, goodbye," said Dixie.
"Remember! If you two ever need me, I'm only a stone's throw away," said Kunning.
"Thanks for everything you've done for all of us, Kunning," said Dixie.
"It's my pleasure. In the words of K.lumsy, I don't want to destroy an island full of cute little monkeys. Not that this hints at the kongs being cute or little," said Kunning.
"Yeah, K.lumsy was a bit insensitive with that," said Dixie.
Kunning waved and disappeared as silently as he had come. One moment he was there. The next, he vanished into the menacing forest.
...
"Why aren't your guards any good! They let her right in!" yelled Zinger.
"Sorry, boss! Arich got any guards already outside! And Krow and her kids killed any which kame out afterward!" said Krusha holding the door shut with a dozen other kremlings.
Klank came over.
"I've almost got all the wooden beams in place, and we're beginning to pile everything to bar the door, sir," said Klank.
"I kan see that!" said Zinger.
Bang! Bang!
"I'll have to go help brace the door!" said Klank.
"This is our darkest hour," said Krumple.
"You think?" asked Zinger.
"Now would be the time for a motivational speech," said Knocka.
"Like what?" asked Kannon.
"Something along the lines of this. Let us, therefore, brace ourselves for our duties. And so bear ourselves that, if the Kremling Empire and its dominion territories last for a thousand years, kremlings will still say, this was their finest hour," said Krumple.
Lemguin began to clap.
"I should've said that," said Zinger under his breath.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
"Brace the doors!" said Klump.
"I know you're in there," Krow said, hissing.
"Truce? We're waving the white flag!" said Zinger.
"I don't see any white flag. Nor do I trust you," said Krow.
"How are you ekspekted to see it through that door?" asked Zinger.
"Bekause it doesn't exist! Anyone who leaves this room is dead! Do you hear me, dead!" said Krow.
"Sir! I found the key for the sekret passage in the back!" said Krook.
"Good! Let's move out! Kount everyone first!" said Zinger.
"Ok! 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10! 11! 12! 13! 14! 15! 16! 17!" said Krook counting on his fingers.
Zinger glared at him, "You forgot to Kount yourself."
"Oh! My bad! 18! That's all of us!" said Krook.
"Ok! Now we eskape!" said Zinger.
"There's a sekret passage??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Aargh! Arich, you idiot!" said Krow, "How is my koup going to work if I kan't even kill them!!!!!!"
"The building plans made no mention of it!" said Arich.
"Of kourse not!! It's a sekret! Go find it! The door seems wedged shut now. More than it was before! I would have to bash this door to smithereens before I kould get in!" Krow fumed.
"I'll see what I kan do," Arich said, completely undeterred.
...
Arich eventually found the back door. She consequently sealed up the exit with her impervious webs. The webs let no light in. They created pitch-black spaces on the brightest of days. Sunlight was simply absorbed, leaving a void where the strands were. The kremlings found this out relatively quickly. Their kremling blades snapped on the thinnest of fibers. Perhaps, the only things able to pierce the webs of Arich were either Kunning's lasers or the enchanted blades created by the banana fairies and the elven kind hidden deep in the jungles of DK Island.
"We're trapped!" said Kritter holding the pieces of his shattered sword.
Kutlass swung his blades with a deadening stroke. His sword splintered into a thousand pieces and became dangerous shrapnel. Several of the kremlings immediately next to him were wounded from his attempt to pierce it. At this moment, Krow bashed through the door, leaving her silhouette engraved. As they had left the invisible secret door open, Krow was upon them in an instant.
"Why did we smash all our swords!" said Lemguin in despair.
...
"I will leave you, Arich, as the ruler of Crocodile Isle in my stead. Do whatever you want. Just make sure there's an island for me to return to.
"Will do!" said Arich, "Have fun killing that Dixie Kong!"
"I will," said Krow flying out the door.
Her babies followed. The last thing Arich saw of Krow and her children was them soaring toward DK Island.
...
Dixie climbed in the thick branches of the huge bramble plants that grew from the mountain, carefully avoiding their sharp thorns. The largest branches were quite harmless, as they only had a few huge spikes that were easily avoided. The thinner branches had much more thorns and got very annoying after a while. A lot of spikeless plants, quite similar to long green ropes hung around too, and the Kongs mostly used those for climbing around. When they'd first entered the bramble forest, the view over the Krem Quay had been amazing, but now night had fallen and it was too dark to see anything past the plants blocking the view. They'd already passed the top of the precipice and were now traveling horizontally, looking for a way down. An owl hooted somewhere, and grasshoppers chirped. The Moon shone through the plants, creating a weird but pretty patchwork of light and shadows everywhere. A sweet flowery smell filled the air.
“I think I like this place.” Dixie sighed. “It's quite pretty.”
Diddy giggled. “You changed your opinion quickly. I think it was just ten minutes ago that you were cursing these thorns stinging you and getting in your hair.”
“Yeah, I know, but look at the Moon shining through the plants like that. And smell that sweet smell, and tell me honestly you don't like this place.”
“I like it. I'm just saying you don't like it as much as you think right now," said Diddy.
"Yowch!" said Dixie eyeing the long gash down her arm, "These thorns! Why doesn't someone just torch the place!"
"That was quicker than I expected!" said Diddy.
"Diddy! It really hurts!" said Dixie.
"I know, Dixie! Now you know how I see this place!" said Diddy.
...
"We've got to get this done, kwick! K.rool ekspekts us by sundown!" said Klump.
"Let me look!" said Kannon, "Yip! Tiny's definitely late! It's 6:05!"
"Since when did you get one of those fancy wistlatches?" asked Klump.
"Get out of my business!" said Kannon.
"You stole it, didn't you," said Army.
"No! K.rool gave one to each kompany kommander!" said Kannon.
"I don't believe you!" said Klump.
"Me neither!" said Krumple.
"Oh, kome on! Kut me some slack! I haven't stolen anything since I killed Klank!" said Kannon.
"Tiny's here!" said Army.
"Shouldn't we take her kaptive, too?" asked Klump.
"You idiot! She's a spy for K.rool!" said Kannon.
"But Kunning said," said Klump.
"Kunning doesn't know a thing he's talking about!" said Kannon.
"You kremlings! Over here! You met me in the wrong spot! I told you to meet me at the old oak tree! If it wasn't for all your bickering about a wristwatch, I never would've found you!" said Tiny.
"We did meet at an old oak tree! Hey, this one's got to be at least a hundred years old!" said Army.
"The oak tree I referred to is over five hundred years old!" said Tiny.
"Oh," said Army.
"Where're the prisoners? I don't see them in the kart!" said Kannon.
"You fool! Check under the tarp!" said Tiny.
Kannon pulled off the tarp to reveal Kiddy and DK gagged and bound. The two were struggling. They were attempting to get free of their binds but to no avail.
"How did you get them tied up?" asked Klump, coming over from the front of the cart.
"I knocked them out!" said Tiny.
"You? But you're tiny!" said Klump.
"Well, I did. That is all you need to know. Will K.rool be reaffirmed of my loyalty?" asked Tiny.
"Uh, yeah! Why would this not? This is probably the best gift he's had in years!" said Krumple.
"And on his birthday too!" said Army.
"Both of you interrupted me!" said Klump.
"Were you going to say something different?" asked Krumple.
"No, but..." said Klump.
"Guys! Stop fighting! Just get them into your wagon and go home! The less time wasted, the less opportunity they will have to escape!" said Tiny.
"We're kremlings! We fight!" said Krumple.
"Krumple, I think that was an order," said Army.
"It was," said Tiny.
"Sure thing, boss! We'll get to work!" said Army.
"Get to it!" said Tiny.
"Alright, alright," said Krumple.
A little bit later:
"Wake them up!" said K.rool.
"Wouldn't it be best to let them wake up on their own akkord?" asked an old Bazuka.
DK lifted his head.
"Hmm. What's going on?" asked DK looking around.
Then he saw K.rool.
"K.rool! I'll give you a beating you'll never forget!" said DK.
DK attempted to leap up and tackle K.rool. But he was tied and not able to do any of that.
"Har Har Har! You're awake!" cackled K.rool.
Kiddy then woke up as well.
"And Kiddy! Before I ship you two off to Kremkroc, to be held by the only kremling I trust these days, I wanted to gloat, in front of you!" said K.rool.
Therefore, he gloated. After a few minutes had passed, he yelled at the wizened Bazuka.
"Ship them out! And make it quick! I don't trust Mr. X. I don't trust my own dungeons! And Krusha's not smart enough to even keep the cell locked!" said K.rool.
"Perfect! Send us to him!" said Kiddy.
"Ha! A jokester! If I wasn't at war, I might keep you as a jester! Or maybe a juggler! Make it quick, Bazuka. I don't want them to have any opportunities to eskape!" said K.rool.
"Ok, sir," said Bazuka.
Then K.rool jumped on Kiddy and DK. They were subsequently unconscious.
...
"That was one crazy dinosaur!" said Dixie.
"Yeah! He almost got me!" said Diddy.
"You were rolling to get away from one footfall to end up in the path of another! And that happened again and again and again!" said Dixie collapsing with laughter.
"I could've died!" said Diddy.
"Yes, you could've! But it was unlikely! But it was a funny spectacle to watch!' said Dixie.
"What was his name?" asked Diddy.
"I think his name was Kremosaurus, Kaizo Kremosaurus. And that all trespassers must die!" said Dixie.
"That sounds about right!" said Diddy, "Though he said it more dramatically.
"Did I make it monotonous?" asked Dixie, "I'll fix that."
Dixie repeated what she had said before, but this time in perfect imitation of the dino.
"Perfection!" said Diddy.
"Thank you very much! My theatrical talents are actually appreciated!" said Dixie.
"Haven't they always been?" asked Diddy.
"Well, Screech didn't like my British accent. DK thought my impression of Cranky was ridiculous," said Dixie.
"Why? I thought it was amusing!" said Diddy.
"I don't know. K.rool hated his assistant insulting him. That was me," said Dixie.
"I remember that! That was funny. It was the secretary. And he was positively furious!" said Diddy puffing out his cheeks, "I mean, he had steam blowing out of his ears, and he looked like a tomato!"
"That's right! It was the secretary, wasn't it! He looked pretty funny! I heard the secretary got fired, though," said Dixie.
"I'm surprised it wasn't worse," said Diddy.
"He fired her with actual fire! What's lenient about that?" asked Dixie.
"Oh! I thought he stopped doing that a while ago!" said Diddy.
As they spoke, there was a whirring sound. While they spoke, it began to increase in amplitude.
"What's that noise?" asked Diddy.
"I don't know," said Dixie.
"There's a clearing up ahead," said Diddy.
"So there is," said Dixie.
"The noise is getting louder!" said Diddy.
"Is it a plane?" asked Dixie.
"Hey, Dudes!"
"Where did that noise come from?" asked Diddy.
"It's Funky! Where else would it be coming from, you silly!" said Dixie.
"Where is he anyway? The sound resonates here, and the noise is flooding the jungle," said Diddy.
"I don't know. But I do smell exhaust," said Dixie.
"I'll look around," said Diddy.
"Diddy! Watch out! He's landing behind you! We walked right into a runway!" said Dixie.
"Dudes! Watch out! Kongs off the tarmac!" said Funky.
Diddy jumped out of the way just in time. Then he ducked to avoid being smashed by the plane's right turbine.
"You ok, Diddy-Dude?" exclaimed Funky jumping out of the door of the plane.
"Yeah, Funky! What about you? I see you got your plane fixed!" said Diddy.
"I did! I don't believe it could take another missile, though," Funky said.
"Probably not," said Dixie emerging from the surrounding thickets.
"Old man Cranky told me to fly you up to the Misty Mountains!" said Funky.
"What?" said Diddy.
"The next world! Let's get out of here! There's a crazy dinosaur rampaging this forest! He's angry all right!" said Funky.
"What? I thought we knocked him out!" said Dixie.
Roar! The crashing started getting closer and closer to them.
"Buckle up, dudes! This is going to be a wild ride!" said Funky.
Suddenly, the dinosaur burst into the clearing.
"Dudes, this doesn't look good," said Funky.
"Roar!"
"I'm trying to get as much speed as possible, but this dino is gaining on me!" said Funky.
Just then, the dinosaur bit off the majority of the tail of Funky's plane.
"That's not good!" Funky said as he took off.
"What's wrong?" asked Diddy.
"The tail's gone!" said Funky as he gained even more height.
"What?" said Dixie.
"Don't worry about it! I've flown in worse conditions before!" said Funky.
"Are those the Misty Mountains?" asked Diddy.
"You got it, dude!" said Funky.
After a minute passed, and Funky was far above the mountains when he began to lose height.
"Dudes! This isn't good! I'm going to have to make a crash landing in the Misty Mountains in the middle of winter!" said Funky.
...
"Kunning, I had a question," said Klank.
Kunning was fiddling with the invention he was holding.
"What is it?" Kunning asked, looking up.
"Well, I have a question. How were you able to dekrypt the redakted akkount of Terra Incognita?" Klank asked.
"I used a secret device that I built," said Kunning.
"How does it work?" Klank asked.
"I'm afraid that's classified," said Kunning.
"Do you know where the original dokument is?" asked Klank.
"No. But somewhere in my library, that arrived the other day. Klank, do you think I forged the information in the letter?" asked Kunning.
"Yes," said Klank.
Klank left Kunning's office and proceeded to the library.


:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » January 31st, 2023, 6:05 am

I don't have much to say, but I still like this story. Well done, Tanager.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012


Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 1st, 2023, 2:08 pm

Putting this at the top again.



I was thinking that it would be fun if when we got to 5000 in the Count to 5000 to publish DKC Word Salad (Name courtesy of Cyclone). Here is what it would be so far!
Last Updated: March 21, 2023 2:51 PM
Spoiler!
When you are absolutely bananas, you forget how to walk and control ninjas. Thus one pillow was conveniently modified the way to punish a Kremling which ate all Crystal coconuts! If it flies then Diddy must clip on Peanut gun and take Tiny's Pony to fly across a ocean Diddy obviously got mad at Tiny, so he decided to grope a feisty so Dixie gave Diddy some of her sass for that. Once there were three Kremlings who ate apples. Nobody. Suddenly 888 appeared on 887's post, causing chaos throughout the known universe. 887 was slipping on banana cream pie, yet the big bad and scary Kremling grabbed every banana so Dixie could use them to fart. Dixie and her ponytail caught on barb bananas... oww said The Banana Bird angrily folding the table, yet smelling the monkey, and smacking happily the rear of a smelly kremling. But little hairs stood up on the hand. Then, diamonds are where you don’t become poor. However Krool knew of a secret golden banana hidden at the dump. So, Krool decided to pick up a golden winky that annoyed Donkey so he ate too much and became sleepy. Silly banana girls found Diddy at his jet pack, so he gave them some golden N64s, and the yellow banoffee knew that it was about time. Dixie Kong was hyper and kicked her in the head which caused her to fall into the cesspool and become dirty. The wretched Dixie went over her own tire because silly Kiddy decided to tickle Parry, he flapped and began to carry a huge coconut tree and soon until he dropped by Swanky’s and bananas. Diddy witnessed Thelxinoe through his telescope and Cranky explained that Rambi snatched up my favorite telescope and gave up. To pursue Diddy through a secret haunted cave to defeat the ghost of a chess master named Kreb Wazowski. Cranky then said that the blue telescope was his favorite. Tiny found Chunky drawing a masterpiece quietly with paint cans. Tiny smiled and sat next to Chunky, he turned the painting brush over and gave Tiny some paint to help her learn how to create a watercolor painting. The beautiful waterfall below Tiny roared and provided a relaxing portrait of Ellie drinking up all of the water. Ellie then squirted up the waterfall onto the buzz bomber and defeated the mechanical bee. Finally, Tiny finished jumping around and started walking to her painting of Squitter to complete it. Suddenly, a banana warped in front of Ernie the muppet. Dixie gazed at brushes and thickets she recognized a while Diddy remembered Kiddy had seen several dictionaries. Sweet dreams of peaches in baskets. Smooth butter will make excellent adventures when Flapper decides osaka is bread. Cat-of-Nine-Tails love Forget-Me-Nots because they always hate when Diddy shakes him playfully. After K.rool finished yelling at Humuhumunukunukuapua’a for stirring the pot wrong with a Cat-Of-Nine-Tails by dropping bombs into the sewer combined with two Bristles with caused xylem to nourish the ailing plants. Arctic Abyss speed runners always swoop over in the best way to complete Mudhole Marsh optimally. Supercalifragilisticexpialodocious Klampons love to bite large leaves of oak banana hoard trees and chomp them to satiate their hunger. Fruit Rekoils always thing island oranges are tasty and round and cool bananas. Flowers love to eat sunlight and compost bins with fresh Snapjaws that bite Blunder Hijinx Septuagint deal well with grass roots. Bluster accidentally misfired his woodpecker at Banjo’s house which caused a ruckus. Full crazy sleep on snowmen and slide on crates. Chunky paints expertly by pastel painting, which depicted her waterskiing mechanism built for perfectly by Funky. Diddy loves to rocket towards the clouds with incredible jet packs and peanuts. Grass will be scrumptious when Rambi supercharges his charge to believe in the highest pair of bouncy tires. Full schedules are tasty and empty when people eat muddy ones wil be able to swallowed many dinosaurs. Kazooie thinks Monty Python is hilarious and attractive which caused Banjo to make him dance and jump. Fluffy mittens help Dixie feel cuddled by Diddy lovingly. They love to catapult pillows and become inconceivable siblings. Because rekoils appear in mill levels, they might love bouncing as high as they are sneaky and noisy. When Tiptup composes a symphony for stickerbush world domination, Tiptup walks to the underground bunker that contains magical chocolate, the best delicacy that is known for the edibility of turnips today, which velvet cookies make for very delicious treats. So their finally back performing for you. If you know the words you can join in too. Put your hands together, if you want to(TO BE CONTINUED)

Hope you enjoy!
I’m putting this at the top again, if no one minds. Maybe when this is finished we write short stories in turn inspired by each sentence when we reach 5000? :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 1st, 2023, 4:09 pm

We could, but I might just write the same repetitive stories that are full of affection, since I seem to be good at that. I do like your idea, however.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 1st, 2023, 5:39 pm

I love your stories, Super Luigi! Don't hesitate to write them! :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 2nd, 2023, 7:40 am

Thanks, Tanager, and yours are great too. To help you stay happy, I'll now write some other silly story.

Kremling Kwestions
Spoiler!
In between his adventures, Diddy often wondered about the baddies he faced along the way. Why were so few hostile, but all of them dangerous? Mini-Neckys and Armys actively sought him and DK out when they rescued the banana hoard, but the Kremlings mostly wandered around aimlessly. Even K. Rool seemed like he was only going through the motions and hoping he hit the heroes.

Crocodile Isle only proved more interesting. There he and Dixie were, on enemy territory, and yet, there was only marginal improvement. Among the common Kremling foes, only Krook and Kutlass really attacked them, while everybody else roamed. The bosses, meanwhile, took the Kongs more seriously, so that was something. Diddy chuckled and wondered if the Flitters were outcasts themselves, considering they didn't do anything but stare at the Kongs, and they were part of many bonus games too.

Based on what Dixie told him, the Kremlings in the Northern Kremisphere weren't much different, and there were hardly any of them to begin with. Whether that was a result of the local population being so small, the destruction of Krocodile Kore, or K. Rool's inventions, Diddy didn't know, but he began to deduce that the natural wildlife of each area was far more frightening than the Kremlings he faced. Maybe that was why the two families began barrel racing together? Either way, the chimp didn't mind one bit, as he was already a true Video Game Hero.

The End.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012


Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 2nd, 2023, 4:42 pm

Thank you again, Tanager. I'm not going to write another one right now, but I will later. Knowing me, the story will probably involve much affection, but I'll try to think of something to add to it as well.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 2nd, 2023, 5:51 pm

That's ok, Super Luigi. I may have another chapter out soon, though! :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 20th, 2023, 12:40 pm

Announcing a new fanfiction in the works!
Timber: Wizpig's Return
Expect to see some chapters released soon. And also, with that more chapters of the Kremlings Revenge are coming. The title is a work in progress. If you have any ideas, I'd be happy to hear them! This one is a collaboration between me and my sibling. Also, does anyone have any ideas for good seahorse names?
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 21st, 2023, 2:48 pm

I'm not sure about Wizpig's Return, since I last played the DS version several years ago, but I can try to think of some ideas. As for seahorse names, how about Mystery, Debbie, Rachel, Bob, Bobbo, Bobby, or Quartz? Those immediately came to mind, so they may not be the most fitting.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 21st, 2023, 2:52 pm

Ok. Maybe quartz. I was thinking he likes to be called Seabiscuit. Also, I will come up with something else than Wizpig's Return. Thanks! :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 21st, 2023, 3:47 pm

Timber: The Macgyver of Tigers
Chapter 1 Timber meets Cranky
Spoiler!
Timber:

"What kan we do?!" said K.rool, "Wizpig said that if we kan deliver something of worth to seal our alliance, he would happily use his spells to annihilate the Kong Kore!"
"I don't know what to tell you, sir. I have no idea what would be of worth," said Klomp, K.rool's top advisor.
"We need to kome to a kompromise!" said a wizened Bazuka, "Wizpig holds the destruktion of DK Island in the balance! The Kongs will be quick to seize this opportunity to ally with him and destroy us! There must be something that he wants!"
"You're forgetting the Diddy Kong incident. Wizpig wants to destroy him for that," said K.rool absentmindedly.
"WAIT! That's it!" said Klomp.
"What?" asked K.rool.
"We kidnap Diddy Kong and bring him to Wizpig! You kidnap Diddy Kong and ally with Wizpig at the same time! It hits two birds with one stone!" said Klomp.
"That's genius!" said Bazuka.
"Send a force of the best kremling kommandos to track him down! I want him back here by tonight!" said K.rool.
"Shouldn't we send Krumples instead?" asked Klomp.
"Fair enough," said K.rool, "We kan't spare any of our top troops from fighting in the Southern Kremispheres."
...
Timber was taking his daily walk on the beach. It was the usual time. 8 in the morning. The wind blowing at his face, the waves gently lapping at his feet, The cry of gulls. As Timber strolled, he looked at the blowing trees. Then out at the ocean. The sea was unusually cold for this time of the year. There was something, though, in the very far distance that Timber couldn't possibly make out. It was getting closer, though. What was it?
"What can that be?" asked Timber.
Timber waited and waited, and the object grew steadily closer and closer. Eventually, Timber could make out that the thing was a hoverboat. Soon, he saw a kong inside.
"Is it Diddy?" Timber said curiously.
As the hoverboat got closer, Timber realized that the kong inside was too big for Diddy. A few minutes later, the hoverboat docked.
"Who are you?" asked Timber.
"You don't know who I am? Well, I certainly know who you are," said the mysterious fellow.
"Do you know Diddy?" asked Timber.
"Diddy Kong? Course I do? He's my great-grandson!" said the mysterious fellow.
"Who are you?" Timber said suspiciously.
"The name's Cranky! I have a question for you, Timber," said Cranky, beginning to unload the equipment in the hoverboat.
"Diddy said something about a cranky fellow. I didn't realize that that was your name!" said Timber.
"Not the first time that's happened. So, my question is, do you know where Gregg Mayles resides on this island? I've got some computer equipment that monitors the Kremvision system. It's acting up. I figured one of Rareware's employees would have an idea of how to fix it. Since they participated in the building of DK TV," said Cranky.
"Taj sees him working on the porch of his cabin every morning! I can take all of this to him!" said Timber.
"Great!" said Cranky unloading the last of the computers, "Young man, take good care of this technology. And whatever you do, don't turn it on. If you think you've got it from here, I better get going!" said Cranky.
"Thanks! I've got it from here," said Timber.
"Many thanks, young sir! I'm indebted to your generosity! Are you sure you don't need help?" asked Cranky eyeing Timber pick up the unwieldy objects.
"I've got it," said Timber unsteadily.
"Are you sure?"
"Yip. Perfectly fine," said Timber, "Mr. Mayles will have this first thing tomorrow."
"Good to hear! If you ever need a favor, just let me know. It was hard enough getting this stuff into this there hovering boat!" said Cranky.
"What's Kremvision anyway?" asked Timber.
"We reverse-engineered DK TV and put our feed on a loop and used the cameras to transmit information to make the screens of their computers film them! We can spy on most meetings. But I probably shouldn't be telling you all of this. I better be going,"
"Goodbye!" said Timber.
"Timber, do you know how to turn on one of these? Funky told me to put the key in the hole, but the question is, which one did he mean?" asked Cranky, "You see, he did it for me and expected me to remember which one."
Timber leaned over the side and looked around, "Of my knowledge of cars, it's probably the one right next to the steering wheel."
"Oh! Thank you!" said Cranky as the motor roared to life.
"You're welcome!" Timber yelled over the roar of the engine.
"What was that?!" asked Cranky.
"You're welcome!" yelled Timber.
"Oh! Got it! Best of luck!" Cranky said as the hoverboat zoomed away.
...
Timber decided, in the end, to bring a cart and convince one of the dinosaurs from the dino domain to pull it.
"So, what's in it for me?" asked a yellow brontosaurus.
"I can give you headlights," said Timber.
"Perfect! I'm in! Finally, I can drive on the racetracks at night!" said the brontosaurus.
"Ummm..." said Timber, not knowing what to think.
...
After the dino had finished pulling the wagon to Timber's hut, and some car headlights had been strapped onto his head, the dinosaur moved on and headed in the direction of Fossil Canyon.
"Much easier than carrying it all myself. I better find Taj to give me the directions," said Timber.
Timber walked over to the Taj carpet and said, "Taj! You around?"
The magical genie then flew into sight on his flying carpet2
"Whoa! Timber! How are you doing?" said Taj.
"Great! Some fellow named Cranky Kong wants me to take some computers to the cabin! Could you tell me where his cabin is?" asked Timber.
"Sure! He's over by the dragon forest! You'll find him!" said Taj.
"Thanks!" said Timber.
"Is that all?" asked Taj.
"I think so," said Timber.
"Goodbye, Timber! Have a safe journey!" said Taj flying away.
...
"I know that Cranky fellow said not to mess with it, but it sounds fun to spy on the kremlings. It probably wouldn't hurt to watch for a bit," said Timber.
He plugged in the monitors and pressed the power button.
The screen lit up with a message. PASSWORD!!!
"Uhh," said Timber, "What do I guess?"
Timber guessed. He typed in CrankyKongRacing.
INVALID!!!
"I could've guessed," said Timber.
He typed in DixieKongCountry.
INVALID!!!!
He typed in Goldeneye007.
INVALID!!!!!
Then SwankySideshow.
ACCESS GRANTED! Due to the number of invalid attempts, no editing privileges will be granted.
"What kind of password was that!" said Timber.
He clicked on camera 3, which was labeled K.rool's office.
"I've got 15 Krumples heading at full speed towards the banana hoard! Diddy Kong is stationed there tonight, akkording to intelligence reports!" said General Klump.
"Good!" said K.rool.
"How long?" asked Bazuka.
"An hour or two and Diddy Kong will be khloroformed," said General Klump.
"What's going on?" asked Timber.
"Diddy Kong will be sent to Wizpig tomorrow," said General Klump.
"When will Wizpig arrive here?" asked K.rool.
General Klump checked his wristwatch, "Any minute now, sir."
"Where is K.rool!" Wizpig yelled.
"I don't know!" squeaked the neek, "You should try his office, sir!"
"He better be in there!" said Wizpig.
"We're in here!" yelled Klomp.
Wizpig opened the door.
"Finally!" he said.
"How are you doing, Wizpig!" said K.rool.
"Badly!" said Wizpig.
"Good then," said K.rool.
"I think you meant to say bad then," said Wizpig.
"This villain talk is konfusing. Kan we just talk normally?" asked K.rool.
"Ok. I never had these issues with Gruntilda, but," said Wizpig.
"We have Diddy Kong in our klutches!" said K.rool.
"Sir, the krumples have not got him yet," said Bazuka.
"Klose enough," said K.rool.
"I've got to save Diddy!" said Timber.
He turned off the equipment and ran over to Taj.
"Timber! How are you doing?" asked Taj.
"I need a plane, pronto. Diddy Kong is in danger!" said Timber.
"Alakazoom!" said Taj.
"Thank you, Taj!" said Timber as he began to take off.
...
It was a dark and stormy night. Diddy was on guard duty of the banana hoard. DK had taken a break from guarding it for the past week, and Diddy had been assigned to that job. Thunder cracked outside. In the midst of the darkness, though, he saw eyes.
"Oh no. DK! Kremlings!" said Diddy.
No answer came.
"It's only ten! How can he be asleep?! I guess I could fend off some kremlings," said Diddy.
They approached. It was then that Diddy realized that it was ten or twenty krumples!
"Uh oh!" said Diddy, "That's trouble. Clear off, you rabble! Or I will have to use my machine gun on you! Conker! Prepare to fire!" Diddy hoped that his bluff would scare them off.
"Konker?! Maybe we shouldn't kome after this ape," said one.
"K.rool will have our heads and hides if we don't deliver! Delivering figuratively and physically," said another.
"He's bluffing. There's not enough room for a banana hoard, a machine gun, a chimp, and a bloody squirrel," said a third.
"Are you quoting Gregg?" asked the first.
"Kourse I am! Haven't we all played that game?" asked the third.
They all nodded their heads in general agreement.
"I said, clear off you rabble!" said Diddy.
"Ok, charge. Where's the flashbang?" asked the third.
"Kome on! Just go in! He knows that we're here," said a fourth.
There was a smashing sound, and Diddy Kong protesting at being carried over their heads.
...
Timber jumped out of his plane.
"Diddy! Kremlings are coming for you!" said Timber.
When no response came, he ran inside the cave. He saw that the banana hoard was half-collapsed.
"I'm too late. Where's Diddy's uncle?" asked Timber.
"Diddy's uncle! Diddy's been kidnapped!" said Timber scrambling up the treehouse steps.
"What? What?" said DK waking up, "Go away, Cranky. There's no way that Diddy and the banana hoard have been kidnapped again."
"Not the banana hoard, Diddy's uncle! Just Diddy!" said Timber.
"Could you stop calling me that, Cranky!" said DK.
"It's Timber!" said Timber.
"What a tree's fallen over!" said DK.
"Are you joking, Diddy's uncle?" asked Timber.
"You're not Cranky, are you? You're a tiger," said DK.
"Took you long enough," said Timber.
"Could you not call me Diddy's uncle? My name is DK," said DK.
"Aah! That makes sense. My name is Timber, and I have bad news to deliver. Diddy's been kidnapped!" said Timber.
"What?! No way!" said DK, "Conker hung out with Diddy all night! Show me!"
"I don't think he showed! Look in the banana hoard!" said Timber.
"What?! My little buddy! The kremlings will pay for this!" said DK.
"Which is why I'm going to save him," said Timber.
"What? Why can't I save him," said DK.
"You had your chance, DK! I'm going to recruit some of the other kongs to help. I'm sorry, but we can't both fit in the car," said Timber.
"Really! Well. I'll go back to sleep," said DK.
"Ok," said Timber.
Timber turned on the car and the radio and tuned into Wise-FM. At that point, Top Gear 2's Auckland was playing. Then he drove off to Cranky's Cabin, which he had passed on the way there.

Obviously, part of the title was inspired by Jomingo's idea for a fanfiction of Timber "Mactyger" Tiger. Hope you enjoy. It may not be as high-quality as my other fanfiction, though. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 21st, 2023, 4:13 pm

I think this story was as great as your other entries, Tanager, maybe even better. Thanks for sharing this with us. As for myself, I probably won't write anything right now, since my stories still seem too goofy, but I'm glad you're still here.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012


Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 23rd, 2023, 12:07 pm

I've been too afraid to write more stories, but now I'm going to share whatever comes to mind, since that seems to help.

Dixie Climbs the Land
Spoiler!
One afternoon, Dixie embarked on a journey across DK Island. Donkey and Diddy had already done it, and although the terrain wasn't designed with her in mind, the young woman pressed on regardless. No matter what happened, she would succeed safely.

Up Dixie climbed past many jungles, ruins, and lakes, her mind clear as crystal. The journey was the destination, and she was on the path to freedom. Even the glaciers and factories proved calming to her, for they were familiar.

In a matter of hours, Dixie had done it, and her mission was a success. The land now clambered, the young woman then returned home satisfied for a well-deserved nap. Full of pure joy, she soon slowly drifted off and slept soundly in soothing softness.

The End.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 23rd, 2023, 12:38 pm

I liked it! Full of your detailed descriptive writing and your typical brilliant prose! :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 23rd, 2023, 12:41 pm

I’ll get my next Kremlings Revenge chapter out soon, though. No preview though, because I drafted it so long ago I don’t remember exactly what happens!
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » February 24th, 2023, 4:10 am

Thanks, Tanager, and take all the time you need. That way, we'll both write stories worth reading.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 24th, 2023, 6:58 pm

Thanks for the advice, Super Luigi! :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 28th, 2023, 12:25 pm

Timber: The Macgyver of Tigers
Chapter 2: In Which Timber Discovers That Kremvision is Fried
Spoiler!
"So, as I was saying, Mr. Cranky Kong, Diddy has been kidnapped," said Timber.
"Not again! I've always liked him! but if he needs to be rescued, my back doesn't matter! I'm heading out first thing in the morning!" said Cranky.
"Is there anyone else who would be good on a rescue mission?" asked Timber.
"Dixie Kong would be a natural candidate. DK has already proven himself useless on rescue operations. Kiddy Kong has nothing better to do," said Cranky.
"Do you just assign them jobs on random?" asked Timber.
"Of course! That's my job! It gets them out of my hair! It also keeps them occupied! Why do you think I called K.rool to steal the banana hoard?" asked Cranky.
"That was you?!" said Timber, "Diddy said that he had no idea who instigated the plan! Only that it wasn't K.rool!" said Timber.
"DK did. I told him after the fact. He was very annoyed. Or rather very angry. I don't know which. Either way, he hand-slapped himself and walked off. I thought, at the time, it was to tell Diddy. Apparently not. Anyway, Kiddy and Dixie are your most likely candidates. Oh! Kiddy's working on Kiddy Kong Racing! Kiddy's busy," said Cranky.
"Then who else?" asked Timber.
"Diddy would work," said Cranky.
"He's kidnapped," said Timber.
"I completely forgot!" said Cranky, "I don't know then."
"Is Tiptup busy?" asked Timber.
"He's busy. He is pitching a sequel to Diddy Kong Racing," said Cranky.
"I know that T.T is busy. Drumstick is unoccupied. He just finished the island championship!" said Timber, "Is he a good candidate?"
"He's also with Tiptup," said Cranky, "I may be wrong, though. I'm not entirely certain on that point."
"Why don't I decide this myself," said Timber.
"Fair enough, Timber. But I'm coming with you, whatever you decide," Cranky said.
...
"Timber had flown back to Timber Island. Taj had conveniently turned his plane back into a car, and he had borrowed a trailer from Banjo. Banjo, for one reason or another, always had the oddest of oddities in his shed. Timber never understood how he was able to find such weird things. But Timber had loaded up the trailer with the computer equipment and had driven off to the Dragon Forest.
"I don't know how it would be easy to find him here. Mr. Cranky Kong said that he was far out in the woods. I don't know how I'm to find him," said Timber.
Just then, Timber's eyes alighted upon a laminated flimsy sign stuck into the ground that said, 'Game Ideas and Proposals for me -> This way.'
"That makes things easy!" said Timber.
Every now and then a new sign would show up pointing a different way. Before long, he was at a cabin with many flowers around it. Someone was typing on their computer at a furious pace. This was who Timber was looking for.
"Mr. Mayles! Mr. Cranky Kong said that you should take a look at this broken equipment!" said Timber.
"What? Oh, the Kremvision? I'll take a look at it!" he said, "Timber, why don't you come along inside. I'm sure you're hungry after that long journey."
"I have a question," said Timber.
"What?" he asked.
"How is the game going that you are working on?" asked Timber.
"Timber Island Racing? Rareware is still considering it. I wouldn't bet my money on it, though," he said, "They've really gone down the drain, though."
"Here's the biggest computer!" said Timber hauling it in.
"Would you like help?" he asked.
"I think I'm good!" said Timber.
Timber headed over to the wooden table on his left.
"Not there! It'll break!" he said.
"How about here?" Timber asked while pointing to the right.
"Timber. Just set it on the floor," he said.
"Got it," Timber said.
"Thank you," he said.
Timber headed out the door to grab some more of the equipment. When he came back in, Mr. Mayles had a grim look on his face.
"I just opened it up. The motherboard's fried. Looks to be the work of the DELTA Destroyer Virus. I haven't seen that kind in a while," he said.
"Is there a cure?" asked Timber.
"When your motherboard's fried, you have to replace the parts of the computer. I certainly don't have the resources to replace the parts. I would assume that the rest of them have the same issue," he said.
Timber brought them in one by one, only to be met by a generic comment such as:
"Fried,"
"Dead,"
"Destroyed,"
"Irreplaceable,"
"Kaput,"
"Terrible,"
"The wires are still on fire,"
"The RAM is fine, but the rest of the parts are gone,"
"This one's pristine,"
"What? What did you say?" asked Timber.
"I said that this one is functioning," he said.
"What?! Do you think we can locate the source of the hack with it?" asked Timber.
"I have a suspicion that the kremlings found out about Kremvision. Or they sabotaged their own thing. I'm surprised it took them this long to catch onto Kremvision. I mean we looped a day's worth of feed. I think they would've caught on faster because we don't have the same weather every day," he said.
"So what does that mean? Can you trace the source?" asked Timber.
"Unlikely. I'll try. Has anything unusual happened recently?" he asked.
"Diddy's been kidnapped," said Timber.
"Good God! That's to be the beginning, most likely," he said, "Anything else unusual?"
"The banana hoard has disappeared again," said Timber.
"Not surprising. If I didn't know better, I would think this was the work of Wizpig," he said.
"Or both of them working together," Timber offered.
"That's also true," he said.
"What's keeping Wizpig away?" asked Timber.
"The Einstein-Rosen Bridge that we at Rareware set up. When Rareware collapsed, Wizpig was able to make a return. But once Playtonic was set up, they kept the protections functioning," he said.
"Good to know! Why doesn't K.rool be kept out?" asked Timber.
"Crocodile Isle is within the boundaries of the protection," he said, "I'll stay here and see what I can do."
"I'll head home!" said Timber, "Anything else?"
"Well, there is one more thing. I saw a brontosaurus with headlights last night. I thought I was hallucinating. Have you seen anything of the sort? Honestly, it sounds like something either you, Conker, or Pipsy would've done. Or Kiddy Kong. But I don't think Kiddy is anywhere near the island," he said.
"Well, I haven't heard anything about it," said Timber.
"Really? Well, I better get my eyes checked," he said.
"There's an eye doctor here?" asked Timber.
"No, but don't you think I have ways of leaving the island whenever I want to?" he asked.
"I didn't think about it," said Timber.
"I suppose not," he said.
"I hope you don't mind if I leave," said Timber.
"Of course not!" Feel free!" he said.
"Bye, Mr. Mayles!" said Timber.
"Bye, Timber!" he said, "Oh, and tell Banjo I said hi!"
"I will!" said Timber.
Timber turned on the radio again, and this time Hot Head Bop was playing. He drove off with the trailer and returned it to Banjo. He still wasn't home, but Timber left a note on his door saying that Mr. Mayles had said hi.
"Hopefully, he gets this soon. I'd expect the elements will get to this note before long," said Timber.

Did anyone get the virus reference? Also, this chapter was a bit short. I hope no one minds. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » February 28th, 2023, 4:32 pm

The Kremlings Revenge
Chapter 19 Far Over The Misty Mountains Cold
Spoiler!
Diddy and Dixie woke to the sounds of hammering, explosion, and then...
"Hey, dudes! You're awake! Welcome to the Himalayas!" said Funky.
"We are in the Misty Mountains, Funky! Not the Himalayas," said Dixie.
"Eh, smarty-pants," said Funky, "But alright, if you say so. But either way, there's at least ten feet of snow. But I think I found the entrance to the first level while you were both out!"
"That cave mouth over there?" asked Diddy.
"You got it, dude!" said Funky.
"How long will it take to fix the plane, Funky?" asked Dixie.
"I think my plane will be of commission for a while. But I don't have enough food for the three of us for even a week! And it's the end of autumn! In the mountains! Snow everywhere, and there is no food anywhere!" said Funky.
"So you're saying, Funky, that we need to split up to survive?" asked Diddy.
"Exactly! I can set you up with provisions for the next few days, but I wouldn't risk giving you two more than that. I can build a plane tail out of wood, but I would never trust it. But that is what I will have to do. But I'm sure Wrinkly and Cranky won't let you starve," said Funky.
"When should we leave?" asked Diddy.
"As soon as you two can pack the adequate amount of supplies. Check behind the furthest back seat," Funky said.
"Ok, we'll do that. Funky, don't let us hold you up any longer. You fix your plane," said Diddy.
Funky found the hidden axe, which was concealed in the plane. And then he proceeded to chop down one of the conifers that surrounded them in this alpine tundra. Dixie and Diddy walked with knapsacks loaded with supplies into the cave.
...
After the exchange proceeded, Tiny decided, just to be safe, she would take a very roundabout way. The longer she walked, the more likely she would detect a tail. She started crossing a rope bridge that crossed a ravine. A potential chokepoint, yes, but she doubted that she would be ambushed. Tiny crossed the bridge without being ambushed. Now Tiny entered the ruins of a city of seemingly, kremling temples.
"Easier to lose a tail here in a maze of temples," Tiny thought.
Suddenly, she felt a prick in the neck, and within seconds, her sight blurred. She felt a sharp pain resonate from her neck. Tiny felt for the source of the injury. A feathered dart was lodged in her neck. At this point, a scaly kremling hand gripped her. She tried to struggle out of the grasp. Then she blacked out.
...
"Go Fish!" said Kaboing.
"Ok!" said Krook.
Krook grabbed his fishing pole, his bait, his tackle, and finally, his hat. This had been a very lengthy game of cards. Both had tried to be very accurate. Because if you had to 'Go Fish', that meant spending the rest of the day fishing at the docks. The fishes that were caught were the dinner of the day. The game had been dragging on for weeks! There was no end in sight. Both were tired of this game. Krook had said that this is the most boring game in the world. Kaboing said that it at least beat guard duty. At this moment, Krook was heading out the door.
"Krook! Kome back! I quit!" said Kaboing.
"What! I win?" asked Krook, turning around.
"No! We both lose! This is a failure of a game!" said Kaboing.
"Should we head to the Board Game Shop for another one?" asked Krook.
"Meaning, getting the game that we reserved?" asked Kaboing.
"Exaktly!" said Krook.
...
"Like always, there is a signpost!" said Diddy, "I'd assume that is how Funky figured it out!"
"I think that is exactly what happened!" said Dixie.
The mines they were in were glittered with shining crystals. All around them, kremlings were attentively milling at their work.
The air in the mine was remarkably clean. With just a little smoke and hardly any dust. The ground of the mine was solid rock. The mine was very hot, like a day in the middle of summer. Surprising for the circumstances. The only thing illuminating the cave was the glowing crystal that was abundant. They were still very thirsty but tried to ignore that inconvenience. They made sure not to enter any side tunnels, or they would surely get lost. At one point, they heard a mumbling echo from far away. It grew louder and louder as they continued walking. And then, two kremlings carrying flashlights turned around the corner. The Kongs jumped into a side tunnel just as they walked past.
"That might make things quicker," said Dixie pointing to a minecart.
"Let's hop in!" Diddy said.
"I'm tellin' ya, Krekker," one of the kremlings said, "We should watch out down here! I hear there is a horrible ape-like monster in here. It kould be hiding in one of these side tunnels, overhearing us right now!"
"I know you think that, Kletskook," the other one answered, "You've told me eight times now, but there are no monsters. You're krazy!"
"I'm not krazy!"
"Yes, you are!"
"Are not!"
"Are!"
"Aren't!"
"Are!"
Their argument went on like this while they walked past the tunnel Diddy and Dixie were hiding in. When they were gone, the Kongs came out of their hiding.
“Good to see the Kremlings practicing their rhetorics,” Dixie said in a deadpan that made Diddy giggle.
"I guess they still use this mine," he said.
"I almost feel sorry for the kremlings for having to work in this infernal heat," Dixie said.
They walked on, more carefully now. The tunnels were gradually going up, and the Kongs had to hide from passing Kremlings every now and then. At that point, they rounded a bend and were face to face with a Kutlass.
"You!" said Kutlass.
"Are you the one from Krockhead Klamber?" asked Diddy, recognizing the tell-tale scar on his face.
"You two wrong warped against me! You kan't be in here!" Kutlass said.
"Ah, a kremling! Be quiet, and we will spare you," said Dixie.
"I'm taking my revenge, kongs. KONGS! IN THE MINES! SOUND THE ALARMS!" Kutlass bellowed.
The hammering ceased. The tolling of the alarm bells began. The kremlings dropped their pikes, axes, hammers, sledgehammers, and picks. Then they started pacing around, on guard for the imminent kong attack.
"I suppose they know that we're coming," said Diddy.
"So much for full mercy. They're going to head towards Kutlass's yell and that will lead them to the entrance! Which will lead straight to Funky! We have to lure them from him!" said Dixie.
"Should we dismember the Kutlass responsible for this disturbance?" asked Diddy, jokingly.
"Diddy! Don't joke about such grim things!" said Dixie.
"Wait, your name is Diddy?" said Kutlass, "Doesn't that mean you are Dixie?"
"Yes. What about it?" asked Dixie.
"Diddy Kong and Dixie Kong?" Kutlass said uncertainly.
Kutlass started to back away.
"You two are just names! Diddy Kong and Dixie Kong have well-known exploits, but that is just a bunch of kongs putting all of their deeds into one pair of names! But two chimps kouldn't have done all of that," said Kutlass descending into a whisper.
Dixie took a step forward and adopted an aggressive stance of side-posture.
"On the other hand," Kutlass said, beginning to run away.
"Two chimps are capable of all of that! Because we did them!" said Diddy, he started talking out the side of his mouth to Dixie, "Of course, our 'well-known exploits' may have been exaggerated to some degree."
Kutlass sprinted away at full speed, leaving one of his swords behind him.
"Diddy Kong and Dixie Kong are here to kill us all!" screamed Kutlass.
He knocked other kremlings over left and right and eventually fell off one of the mine's scaffolds. He probably found an untimely death at the bottom. But ultimately, other kremlings took up the call.
"Diddy Kong and Dixie Kong are here to kill us all!"
When all was said and done, only about a quarter of the kremlings remained in the mines.
"That makes things much easier! Is this the meaning of your reputation proceeds you?" asked Dixie.
"Yeah," said Diddy, "What exactly happened? My brain has not computed it yet."
"You don't understand what happened?" Dixie said.
"Not that. Just so many things happened at once. I'm still processing them," said Diddy.
"The kremlings are going to be coming with reinforcements, Diddy. We need to hurry and get out of here," said Dixie.
Dixie and Diddy ran through the level at top speed. Once they realized the size of the level. Diddy and Dixie formulated a plan.
"Since your strat is easier, you take on those Klick-Klacks!" said Diddy.
"Got it!" said Dixie jumping onto the wooden scaffolding above them.
Dixie damaged one and picked it up. The other Klick-Klack, furious at the fate of his counterpart, charged toward Dixie in a frenzy. When the Klick-Klack was at the appropriate distance, Dixie tossed the Klick-Klack she was holding.
"Your hair has gone crazy!" said Diddy, "It's floating in the air!"
"I just have to find a bonus room!" said Dixie.
"There's one above you. But are you certain that the IDs are correct?" Diddy asked as he jumped onto the landing that Dixie was on.
"Positive!" Dixie said.
"There they are! After them!" said a Krumple, among an army of Krunchas, Krumples, and Krushas.
"Time's up!" said Diddy.
Dixie threw her hair forwards. Immediately before their eyes, the bonus barrel warped in front of them.
"Nice job!" said Diddy.
"Thanks! But I believe that's our cue," said Dixie looking proud of herself.
Dixie jumped into the broken bonus barrel and disappeared.
"I'm never going to get used to this," Diddy said as he jumped into the wrong warp barrel.
"Where'd they go?" asked Krusha surveying the scene.
"They were just there!" said a Krumple.
"Everyone! Resume work! The Kongs were never here! I don't want to see any paperwork on this disturbance," said a Kruncha.
"They were just there!" said Kutlass coming up from behind the group of kremlings.
"What do we do with him," Krumple nodded toward Kutlass.
"You know what to do with him," said Kruncha.
"Just making sure," said Krumple.
"Krusha, check out the inventory of krystals. You know how fast we have to get this mine kleared of jewels. Kunning says we have only a few months to akkomplish this task! He said that his math indikated that the next opportunity is in 107 years!" said Kruncha.
...
Tiny woke up. Kunning, at that moment, was checking his watch. Tiny quickly surveyed the room. It was painted white, and there was nothing in the room. The door was open. Kunning looked up. Tiny closed her eyes before he had his head up.
"Tiny, I know you're awake," said Kunning.
"How?" said Tiny as she opened her eyes.
"My wristwatch reflected your face at the angle I had it set at," said Kunning.
"Why am I imprisoned here, Kunning? You should know that we're on the same side," said Tiny.
"Oh ho ho! Are we? You are rather amusing. I heard about your little transaction with K.rool that happened recently," said Kunning.
"What nonsense are you talking about," said Tiny.
"Don't take me for a fool, Tiny. For I am not one. Are you going to give me answers to my questions or not? Truthful answers, I might add," said Kunning.
"In dramatic parlance, I will give my answer to you. No," said Tiny.
"Not very dramatic," said Kunning with a twinkle in his eye.
Tiny took it to say that he was amused.
"I will never talk!" said Tiny quite dramatically.
"I would say that you probably have picked up your sister's theatrical talents," said Kunning, "But I will take that as your answer. If you want to know what I have on you, I will spell it out plainly. You made a handoff between some of K.rool's top operatives and yourself."
"They seemed to me more like a bunch of fools," Tiny said.
"But you admit that you have met with these kremlings," said Kunning, then he added, "They are a bunch of fools if you ask me, though."
"I won't respond to your baseless questions, Kunning. All of them are unfounded. And just because I have met with some kremlings, that doesn't mean that I handed DK and Kiddy over to them!" said Tiny.
"Jiminy Christmas! I honestly thought that K.rool trained his operatives better!" said Kunning, "I said no such thing about them getting kidnapped and you have self-incriminated yourself! I'm going to leave you here still, Tiny. I don't believe that you are going to give me all of the answers I want right now. Maybe a few days on quarter rations will convince you otherwise, Tiny."
Kunning stood up, picked up the chair, and walked away. He closed the door behind him. There was a click.
"Kunning! You forgot to turn the light off!" said Tiny.
"Kunning's gone," said a kremling.
"Then call him back!" said Tiny.
"I'm the one with the keys! Why would I need to kall him back?" asked the kremling.
"Then come in and turn it off!" Tiny said.
"I'm not falling for any of your tricks, Tiny Kong! Kunning warned me that you kould have your binds off by now. And if I went in there, the chair you're sitting on would easily knock me out. Kunning has plenty of foresight, doesn't he? Plus Kunning keeps the light on for his prisoners so they kan read at night!" said the kremling.
"You're kidding, right?" asked Tiny.
"Of kourse I am! It so they have a harder time going to sleep!" said the kremling.
"Do you have a book for me to read?" asked Tiny.
"I'm not falling for that one either!" said the kremling.
"Aargh!" said Tiny.
"Not falling for that either!" said the kremling.
"Huh?" Tiny said, confused.
...
Diddy and Dixie beat level after level. After the mines, they entered a cave with a maze of barrel cannons. After that, they could see Wrinkly's Save Cave. She was asleep. But they didn't bother to wake her to save their game. The news was running on the tv and it was talking about a mysterious series of tornadoes forming all around DK Island. Apparently, nobody knew why. After they left, they proceeded to the exit of the caves. This was their first time out of the caves since the plane crash.
"It's finally bright!" Dixie said as she took in the crisp mountain air.
"Interesting. There are still crystals embedded into the cliffs! I think we have to team toss into the barrel cannon, Dixie. I don't see another path," said Diddy.
Dixie tossed Diddy into the barrel cannon. The auto-fire cannon shot them into the minecart. The level, although the platforming wasn't that difficult, every now and then, there was a close call. In time, Dixie and Diddy saw a warning sign.
"What's that?" asked Diddy.
"There's an abyss above ahead, Diddy. Which means only one thing!" said Dixie.
"Is that a barrel cannon?" asked Diddy, "Oh, it is."
"Jump!" they both exclaimed.
They jumped out of the mine cart and into the barrel. The mine cart fell into the chasm below. The barrel cannon shot them into another, in which they hovered over the end target. Dixie decided to grab a life balloon for her efforts. Outside the level, Funky's Flights was in front of them. Naturally, Diddy and Dixie debated whether to go in or not.
"Funky would be happy to see us!" Dixie said.
"But do we have the time?" asked Diddy.
"It would be nice to see him, even for a few minutes," said Dixie.
"we might be able to stay for a few minutes," Diddy eyed the sky, "But it's really starting to cloud over, Dixie. I really don't like the look of this storm."
"I'll be quick! But Diddy, you should come too," said Dixie.
Diddy eyed the storm again, "I'll be in right after you. But I really don't like the look of this storm. Looks more like a hurricane."
"The sky's green!" said Dixie.
"I noticed," said Diddy.
"You're overreacting, Diddy! We're not going to get any tornadoes or any hurricanes!" Dixie said laughing.
"Still," said Diddy.
Dixie opened the door. No one was inside.
"Funky doesn't seem to be home," said Dixie.
"Is his plane there?" asked Diddy.
"Yes, but it looks pretty beat up," said Dixie.
"Let's go," said Diddy.
"You look happy," said Dixie.
"I would like to get to Cranky's as fast as possible! He said if the weather got too bad, we could always shelter with him," said Diddy.
"His cabin can't be too far away. I wouldn't want to be outside in this storm," said Dixie.
For the rest of the day, Diddy and Dixie sprinted through the rest of the levels. Both of them were very eager to outrun the approaching maelstrom. The duo beat Snowy Barrel Blast with the assistance of Winky. Zoomed through Sloped Skiway with the help of a mountain goat. Expresso charged through Expresso's Expressway with ease. Then came Rambi in Winter Wildlands. At Klubba's Kiosk, Diddy and Dixie entered for the first time.
He greeted them with, "I'm Klubba! And I'm here to guard this magik barrel! This time I won't let you pass! No bribing..."
"Are you serious?" asked Dixie.
"No! Of kourse not! If you have the korrekt fee I will happily let you through! But until then, none shall pass!" Klubba laughed.
"How about 15 kremkoins?" asked Diddy.
"Inflation these days. I guess I'll take the 15 kremkoins since you didn't know," said Klubba.
"What's the fee for kremlings now?" asked Diddy.
"29.446 kremkoins," Klubba said.
"Really?" said Dixie, "You make them pay the decimal point?"
"I usually round it up to thirty... But for kremlings I don't like, well they have to look for 29.446 kremkoins in change! They never kan. They kan always give me 29.44 kremkoins or 29.45 kremkoins. But they never kan figure out how to get six-tenths of a kremkent," said Klubba.
"Very funny," said Dixie, "I hope you aren't going to make us pay that next time we come."
"I wouldn't dream of it!" said Klubba, "I only have so much time, kongs. Are you going to pay up, or are you going to klear off?" asked Klubba.
Dixie eyed his club.
"Uhh, maybe we should leave," said Dixie.
"I wouldn't dream of whacking you with my klub, Dixie. Unless you were to fight me first," said Klubba.
"Bye, Klubba!" said Diddy.
"See you, kongs!" Klubba said.
"When we finish the game, Klubba, we'll drop all of our kremkoins off with you!" said Dixie.
"Glad to hear it! I hope you skupper K.rool's plans!" said Klubba.
...
"Is this supposed to be a level?" asked Dixie as they walked.
"I don't know. It says Snowy Mountain Forest. Which that doesn't sound like a completed level," said Diddy.
"Are you saying that it is in the beta stages?" asked Dixie.
"Maybe. But it's creepy. There are kremling bodies all over the place," said Diddy.
"Are they all dead? I think so," said Dixie.
Diddy checked the pulse of one.
"Dead as a doornail," said Diddy.
"What's so dead about a doornail, anyway?" asked Dixie.
"I don't know. I never actually thought about it!" said Diddy laughing.
"This one's alive," said Dixie.
"He is?" said Diddy, "He looks dead, "He seems pretty green to be alive."
"Diddy, he's a kremling. What do you expect?" asked Dixie.
The Klomp sat up.
"You two are kongs, but I might as well warn you. There was a big, skary bird here. It questioned every single one of us for news about a kong with a ponytail. None of us knew, and it killed us all. I played dead and she thought that I was already dead. I'm telling you this since I don't want that bird to find this kong. And you seem to match the deskription," said Klomp.
"Me?" asked Dixie.
"Yes, you," said Klomp.
"Give us all the details, Klomp," said Diddy.
"First, it kame upon us like the sound of a hurrikane!" said Klomp, "Then..."
He choked and then fell back over.
"Are you ok?" asked Diddy.
"Maybe she did skratch me," said Klomp, "Do you know who this bird is?"
"Krow," said Dixie.
"Kould you two help me? I'm going to be in hot water with the kommander, but not if you two help me," said Klomp.
"What's the difference between us helping you and not helping you?" asked Diddy.
"I'm the leader of this Kremling platoon. If the kommander realizes that everyone but me is dead. Well, he will suspekt that I killed them myself. He definitely will not believe some outrageous story about a ghost bird," said Klomp.
"Why would he believe your story if we help you?" asked Dixie.
"Well, I'll have two witnesses to back me up," said Klomp.
"Are you thinking straight?" asked Dixie, "We'll be captured if we head anywhere near that camp."
"You're right, I am delirious," said Klomp.
"I don't think you're delirious," said Diddy, "Dixie, Cranky's Cabin is nearby. Maybe Cranky could help him."
"Diddy, can we even lift him together?" asked Dixie.
"Dixie and Diddy? You two seem a lot nicer than the stories they say about you. Murderous, bloodthirsty fiends. But you two seem nice. And anyway, you kan help me walk," said Klomp.
"I suppose that to the kremlings, that is exactly what we are," said Diddy.
"We'll help you walk," said Dixie.
"Thanks, kongs!" said Klomp, "I probably will owe my life to you. Anyway, I kan't go back to the kommander, he'll have my head most likely. But I kan appeal to Kunning. Kunning will understand. And this is probably not the only incident that this bird has kreated. Kunning will believe my story." said Klomp.
Diddy and Dixie helped him up and walked him to the nearby cabin. When they arrived, Cranky was rocking in his rocking chair. The storm was getting quite fierce, and cracks of lightning and thunder were erupting across the sky frequently. The atmosphere was very black, and it was super windy.
"So, you're back, eh? That was quick. Come to see your frail, old grandpappy?" Cranky said, "Did that obnoxious Funky Kong tell me where I was?"
"No, of course not! We found you on our own!" said Diddy.
A crack of lightning struck down from the heavens, and the rain started pouring even harder than it was.
"Who's that?" asked Cranky.
"Klomp!" said Diddy, "Krow attempted to kill him! He's injured, and he almost died!"
"Diddy! Dixie! You better come inside! This gullywasher looks like it is just getting worse! Leave this Klomp on the porch!" said Cranky.
"Why?" said Dixie, "He's hurt!"
"I'll tell you when we get inside!" said Cranky.
"We've been trying to outrun this storm for ages!" said Diddy, "It seems like it just caught up with us!"
"This is the worst storm I've had in decades!" said Cranky, "I hope the roof doesn't blow off!"
"Me too!" said Dixie.
"You're just leaving me here?" asked Klomp.
"We'll try to convince Cranky to let you stay inside!" said Diddy.
"And what if he doesn't!" Klomp said through the raging winds.
"He won't!" Dixie said as the wind grew in strength.
"Hurry! This is bound to be a hurricane by the sounds of it!" said Cranky.
Cranky held the door open until Diddy and Dixie could squeeze through.
"That's better. That is one fierce gullywasher!" said Cranky.
"Why can't Klomp come inside?" asked Dixie.
"I've already guessed the story. I have seen this one before. Kremling plays dead. Escapes unscathed, then he says he's injured, etcetera. He's a kremling spy. That or Krow put him up to this. Or he put himself up to this, and Krow spared him. Very few kremlings are nice. The truth is that," said Cranky.
"He was a bit quick to befriend us. Especially with the whole bloodthirsty murderer thing," said Diddy.
"Cranky. Klomp will die if he stays out there," said Dixie, "You should reconsider. If he isn't a spy, he's a legitimately nice kremling that will die."
"Ok, Dixie. Put him in the basement," said Cranky.
"What if it floods?" asked Dixie.
"It won't," said Cranky.
"How do you know?" asked Dixie.
"Cranky, this is ridiculous. Just put Klomp in your attic," said Diddy.
"Diddy, this cabin doesn't have one," said Cranky.
"Then put him on the couch," said Dixie.
"It's the basement. It won't flood with the work I put into it," said Cranky.
"Kan I kome in?" asked Klomp.
"Klomp, have you been eavesdropping?" asked Cranky.
"No, I haven't been dropping any eaves. You see, your kabin doesn't have any!" said Klomp.
"Stop being a fool," said Cranky, "You were clearly smart enough to play dead when Krow came. You know the definition of eavesdropping."
"Sorry," said Klomp, "Kan I kome in now?"
"Fine," said Cranky.
Klomp ran down the stairs of the basement. And Cranky locked the door behind him.
"Can't be too careful," said Cranky.
"Diddy, you take the floor. I'll hand some blankets for you two. Dixie, you get the couch," said Cranky.
"Thanks for the shelter," said Diddy, "I sure wouldn't want to be out in that storm."
"No problem! I did promise my cabin for when the weather got too bad!" said Cranky.
Cranky grabbed a few blankets out of the closet. And Diddy and Dixie got to work creating suitable beds. Diddy set up his bed by the fire. Dixie set her bed up on the couch.
"Dixie, I suppose that you want more information out of me for your book?" asked Cranky.
"I completely forgot! Yes!" said Dixie.
"Start asking away, then," said Cranky.
"Ok. This question has been bugging me for a while, Cranky. Who founded the kremling libraries on Crocodile Isle?" asked Dixie.
"Well, that is a long story. Alberich Krock, set up one for his kids. And then his successor, Beatrice Krock, set most of the rest up. Next!" said Cranky.
"Why did Klomps mutate into Kaboings?" asked Dixie.
Lulled by the crackling and warmth of the fire, Diddy found himself falling asleep. The rain was pounding hard outside, but Diddy found it relaxing rather than scary inside the cabin.
...
"I didn't get the game restocked as quickly as I would've liked!" said Larry.
"What about the komplementary kard game?" asked Kaboing.
Of the randomized card decks I have. Let me see," said Larry.
Larry went into the back room. There was a rummaging sound, a crash, and a screeching cat. He then came back.
"Sorry for CJ," said Larry.
"Who?" asked Krook.
"My cat," said Larry.
"Oh," said Krook.
"There you go!" said Larry, "That's the random card game of the day!"
"Chance?" said Krook.
"I'd never heard of it either," said Larry.
"Let me see," said Kaboing.
"Remember, no instructions are provided," Larry said, "It's your job to figure that part out on your own."
"Got it!" said Kaboing.
"Goodbye!" said Larry.
"Bye!" said Kaboing.
"Will you be back soon?" asked Larry.
"Of kourse!" said Krook, "This is the most exciting part of our day!"
...
"Kunning, you've got a package at the front door," Klank said, coming in.
"Which one?" asked Kunning.
"Front door 3," said Klank.
"Holy... How big is that, forty feet tall?" asked Kunning.
"Forty-one feet to be exakt, sir," said Klank.
"I'll be right out!" said Kunning.

Hope this is as good as the rest! Also, the Timber book sounds to me similar to your style of silly stories. What do you think, Super Luigi? :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » March 1st, 2023, 1:07 pm

I don't remember a Timber book, but these chapters are as good as your other ones, Tanager. You really do have a great style of writing that is both comedic and dramatic, which always makes your stories wonderful to read. Although I often worry that my own tales are too silly, your willingness to write whatever you want certainly inspires me, so we'll see what happens. Thanks again for sharing these stories with us.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 1st, 2023, 3:41 pm

Thanks, Super Luigi. I don't believe that you wrote a Timber story. I was saying that I thought that that story was more silly than my usual ones. Thanks for the praise. It's funny, I always think that my stories are more ridiculous than comedy. But then again, I've had these chapters in the drafting stages for at least a month, so these jokes are certainly not new. In homage to Rare's other games, though, Starfox, Krystal, Bumper, Conker, and Kazooie will make appearances soon. Though most of these characters show up because of Tiny's "treachery". Thanks again! :dixiehappy: :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » March 2nd, 2023, 12:24 pm

You're welcome, and now, I'll try my hand at writing something. Hopefully, it helps.

Three Paths
Spoiler!
After much deliberation, Donkey decided to head out and complete the new side of the island. The journey was quite arduous, but he managed to pull through and complete everything. His duties finally finished, the big man soon headed home satisfied with a great deal of treasure.

Dixie and Tiny shared their supreme sisterliness again, which proved quite soothing and silly. Rather than cower in fear before them, however, Diddy stood his ground and stuck around, for he was incredibly brave and brotherly. All three best friends were indeed true siblings, and that would never change.

Meanwhile, Banjo and Kazooie embarked on a quest to stop Gruntilda from eating Tooty. The world was large, and Mumbo was constantly taxing them both, but this did not deter the pair, for they simply charged forth instead. All of the secrets would soon be theirs, and the day would be won handily.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012


Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 3rd, 2023, 5:20 am

I fixed some grammar in chapter 19. I haven't fixed the cs yet.
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » March 10th, 2023, 7:44 am

Banjo's Big Break
Spoiler!
Like Donkey before him, Banjo set out on another quest of recycled stages. Although the journey was more difficult, especially since Kazooie did not join him until the end, he proved victorious once more and saved his sister. Following Tooty's suggestion, both bears and bird soon visited their Kong friends to start their vacation properly.

Both Banjo and DK consumed much food to celebrate, while Kazooie and Cranky complained about themselves and each other. Diddy and Dixie, meanwhile, giggled greatly as Tooty tickled Tiny to greet her, before the four friends found and played their instruments together.

Meanwhile, Rambi laughed as Mumbo tried his best shaman magic to no avail, for the rhino was already both an animal and invulnerable, but the funny skull man was not through yet.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 10th, 2023, 9:03 am

"Heck Rambi!" Mumbo said.
Well done, Super Luigi
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 10th, 2023, 3:45 pm

I fixed chapter 19 kremling speech.
:parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 19th, 2023, 3:40 pm

The Kremlings Revenge
Chapter 20 Kunning's Alliance
Spoiler!
"Kunning!" Klank said, barging in.
"What is it this time? Can't you see I'm busy here? This is sensitive equipment I'm handling here!" Kunning said.
"You're not busy, Kunning. They're just a kouple of beakers you're pouring with your gloved hands," said Klank, accidentally bumping into Kunning.
"Klank!" Kunning said, dashing away to get a different set of beakers.
The two beakers that Kunning previously was holding crashed to the floor. Glass shot across the room. An acrid, burning smell started to rise.
"What's that bad smell koming from?" asked Klank.
"It's the superacid!" Kunning yelled, panicking.
Klank realized that below his feet, there was a hole shaped like the spill. And the hole was steadily burrowing down. Below the concrete, below the bedrock, below everything, below sight. Kunning was hastily pouring vials together. Kunning ran over to the contamination site and frantically poured the solution into the rapidly (supposedly) deepening chasm.
"That should do it," said Kunning.
The abyssal chasm disappeared, and the ground regenerated. It looked like there was no difference in the concrete.
"What was that?" Klank asked, "Speciality mining equipment?"
"Compound 1080," said Kunning.
"Why is it kalled that?" asked Klank.
"It's classified," said Kunning.
"Oh, really," said Klank.
"It actually is classified," said Kunning.
"So you kan't tell me what it does?" asked Klank.
"Are you really asking me that question, Krash?" asked Kunning.
"Why are you kalling me that?" asked Klank, "You know what my name is."
"It's my new nickname for you," said Kunning, "And by the way, it is a superacid."
"Hmm, I think I like that name," said Klank.
"Well, you have to. It's the only name you're getting," said Kunning as he walked off.
"Maybe I kan skare the bejesus out of Donkey Kong one of these days, though. He sure is afraid of Krash!" said Klank with a grin.
...
"That was a pretty ice cave," Dixie said blissfully.
"Beautiful, I think you mean. It was amazing! The name, Crystal Cave, doesn't do it homage at all!" said Diddy.
"I'm really happy there was no ice water to go along with it, though. But then there was the underwater level following it! Enguarde was hidden in the entrance! Of all things!" said Dixie.
"It was very sneaky," said Diddy.
"Sneakier than a Sneek?" asked Dixie.
"Doubtful," said Diddy.
"But how sneaky is a Sneek, anyway?" asked Dixie, "They make a squeaking sound that you can hear from a mile away!"
"But Sneeks are very sneeky!" said Diddy.
"What?" asked Dixie, scratching her head.
"Does it help that Neeks are very neeky?" asked Diddy.
"Ah! S-n-e-e-k-y!" said Dixie.
A signpost loomed up ahead. Icicles were hanging off of it. And the majority of the sign was covered with frozen snow. Dixie breathed on the signpost with her warm breath. As if to show how frigid it was, her breath was visible. But as Dixie expected, it did not manage to thaw one bit. Around them, the plants were frozen and had hoarfrost hanging from them. Diddy ran his hand across the signpost with his hands. It refused to come into focus. A "P" showed up, and then an "E".
"Brr! It'd be nice if I had some gloves," said Diddy, "I might be able to clean the sign! And it's very cold."
Diddy rubbed his hands together.
Dixie, who had gloves given to her by Wrinkly, said, "I'm not using my gloves! Most likely, they would freeze to the sign. Besides, they don't offer much warmth. Wrinkly gave me a pair of wool mittens and silk gloves, but I lost the first pair. Wrinkly shouldn't have given me these. They are completely useless, Diddy," said Dixie.
"I can bet!" said Diddy.
Diddy rubbed his hands together some more.
"But at least they offer some, Dixie. I would think that they are better than nothing," said Diddy.
"I guess you are right, Diddy," said Dixie.
"Look, Dixie! A light!" said Diddy.
"Where?" asked Dixie.
"There!" said Diddy as he pointed behind Dixie.
A lantern light bobbed in the distance. Diddy and Dixie could barely see it. That was because of the bitter, arctic winds blowing everything askew. The raging, blinding, white snow that enveloped their surroundings didn't help. It was the worst kind of blizzard, no doubt. The bobbing light went out.
"Oh, Klaptrap!" yelled a hoarse voice in the distance.
"Who do you think that is?" asked Dixie.
"Now I'll have to rekindle it! And, of course, I left my tinderbox as well! Of all the things I've forgotten today, this is the worst!" said the husky, coarse voice, "Well, I'll have to do without. It's mandatory to investigate any disturbance."
"I suppose we are the disturbance," said Diddy, "But I wonder what set it off."
"Maybe there was a pressure plate surrounding the sign," offered Dixie.
"Possibly," said Diddy, "But if that's true, then he sure gets a lot of false alarms."
"Who would be up in this blizzard?" asked Dixie.
"Maybe he doesn't get as many as I thought," said Diddy.
"The question is, should we hide," said Dixie.
"Of all the days! The flurry isn't that bad, but it's freezing! Even for here. But it's the procedure. And I can't break them after following them for all these years. And anyway, it's the code," said the voice.
"It's probably more like a set of guidelines. People just can't tell the difference. But should we hide, Diddy?" asked Dixie.
"I think not. Especially since there isn't anywhere to hide," said Diddy.
"The blizzard doesn't count?" asked Dixie.
"Ah! Good one," said Diddy, "Maybe we should quiet down so that we can sneak up on him."
"Uh, BOO!" said the voice.
Diddy and Dixie jumped clear up into the air.
"A couple of kremlings, eh? Well, I can't let you pass," said the voice.
"We're a couple of kongs!"
"Then why didn't you say so!" said the voice.
"You didn't give us time!" said Dixie over the blasting winds.
The voice which had just materialized out of the storm turned from a stern frown to a grin. The old bear's beard and mustache were pure white. But that might have been amplified by the snow. His beard had icicles hanging from it, but his eyes were warm as burning coals. But his eyes weren't unfriendly.
"I'd like to help you, but I need to know your business," said the wizened bear.
"Are you one of the Brothers Bear?" asked Dixie.
"No. But I am one of that species!" said the bear with a gravelly laugh, "Is your business good or bad?"
"We are heading to destroy K.rool!" said Diddy.
"That crazed crocodilian nut?! I'd like to see him given a good thrashing again! It's been a while since he's had one!" said the bear, "But if that's all, I would be happy to give you food and shelter! So many kremlings have passed through here, and we've had to amp up our security!" said the old bear.
"We've? What do you mean?" asked Dixie.
"Well, Bramble keeps the beacon! Over there on the peak of Fanuilos! I don't understand how she keeps all of her plants warm enough! Some of them are of the tropical variety you see. And she doesn't have a greenhouse. Not that I know of, at least. Katastrophe Kong keeps the lamppost. On the peak of Celebdil, way over there! And I keep the lighthouse! If you don't know, this is the peak of Zirag-Zigil!" said the bear.
"What's your name?" asked Diddy.
"Cantankerous! What's yours?" asked Cantankerous.
"Diddy," said Diddy.
"Dixie. But isn't that a bit odd for a bear?" asked Dixie.
"Is it a crime to be named something else than a name that starts with a B?" asked Cantankerous, chuckling.
"No, I just assumed that it was sort of an unspoken rule. I meant no offense," said Dixie.
"None taken. Silly bears, my parents were. We were so isolated it didn't matter. My name was based on the first word I said! My first word was, 'Hmmpf!'," said Cantankerous.
Cantankerous started heading in the direction he had come from. Dixie and Diddy naturally followed him.
"So, is it an actual lighthouse?" asked Diddy.
"It used to be! My dad used to light it every night! Since then, it's been broken!" said Cantankerous.
"Do you live there?" asked Dixie.
"Of course!" said Cantankerous.
"Do you know what the frosty sign says?" asked Diddy.
"It's the name of the level," said Cantankerous, "Some people call it Lemguin Luge, but the rest of us call it Penguin Panic."
"Who would be panicking? Us? Or the kremlings?" asked Diddy.
"Well, because it's you two, the infamous Dixie and Diddy, it'd be the kremlings that be panicking!" said Cantankerous.
"That's good news," said Diddy smiling.
"Here we are!" said Cantankerous.
...
"Ok, pay poor tax of $15!" said Krook.
He wrote down -15 to his total of 130. He ended up with 125.
"That's 15 less for you, Kaboing!" said Krook.
"Wait till you see this kard, Krook!" said Kaboing, "It's a doozy!"
Kaboing laid down a pay $150 card.
"You're right! I'm below $0 now! I'm at -$25!" said Krook.
"Do I win yet?" asked Kaboing, "How much money do I have left?"
"85 dollars. I've got a good kard! Kollekt 200 dollars!" said Krook.
"What does that put you at?" asked Kaboing.
"165 dollars!" I think I've got you in the bag!" said Krook excitedly.
"Here's my last kard! Kollekt 40 dollars for the sale of stock!" said Kaboing.
"Oh, kome on!" said Krook.
Krook laid down his last card. Pay 50 dollars to each player
"I win!" said Kaboing, "165 minus 25 equals 140! 85 minus 50 equals 300!"
"I think you've got it horribly mixed up, Kaboing. You win, but the final skore is 125-115. You win!" said Krook.
"This is a fun game!" said Kaboing.
"I think you only think that bekause you won, Kaboing," said Krook.
"Maybe, Krook. I think it's time to report for sentry duty," said Kaboin.
"Oh, kome on, Kaboing. It's horribly boring. We're supposed to watch out for kongs, and none ever kome! Everyone tells us that the next kong attack is always imminent! But there hasn't been even a single one!" said Krook.
"I think all of the kongs have fled," said Kaboing.
"I wish we kould just march into battle and wage war on the kongs!" said Krook.
"We kould ask the division commander to do that," said Kaboing.
"And he'd do that?!" said Krook, "I don't think so."
"Might as well ask," said Kaboing.
"Where are you going?" asked Krook.
"I'm going to find Re-Koil! He always knows where stuff is!" said Kaboing.
"Kome back, Kaboing! You're going to get yourself killed!" said Krook.
"Re-Koil says that he isn't as stern as that," said Kaboing.
"Well, Re-Koil is misinformed!" said Krook, "No one has ever returned from an audience with him!"
"That's bekause no one has requested an audience with him, Krook!" said Kaboing.
"Of all the hare-brained ideas Kaboing had, this is the worst. I'm not going to follow him, though," Krook said to himself, "He got himself into this pikkle, and he's going to get himself out of it."
...
"Here we are!" said Cantankerous.
He opened the door, and when the two of them had entered the warm building, he shut the door sealing the icy wind out.
"Warm up in front of the hearth!" said Cantankerous tossing his soaked hat in front of the fire and plopped down in his reclining chair.
He turned on the tv, and Jeopardy turned on.
"Give me a second to see the results! Then you tell me the whole story!" said Cantankerous.
"And Matt Amodio wins the 38th Tournament of Champions!" said Alex Trebek.
"I knew it!" said Cantankerous.
He turned off the tv.
"This is a great thing! Finally, this proves that he's better than Amy Schneider!" said Cantankerous.
Diddy and Dixie were toasty in front of the hearth. When Cantankerous called them over to tell him their story. Dixie came over, but Diddy did not. He had fallen asleep.
"Poor guy! All tuckered out!" said Cantankerous.
"I'll tell our story by myself then," said Dixie.
"One more thing, you may be curious. My family has not always managed the Lighthouse. There was a bear named Desmond who kept the light lit every night. He was the person who was here before us.
...
Tiny had been in her cell for a week. Starving for a week. Kunning had brought her food, but she had refused to eat it. She assumed it was poisoned. At this point, she was not willing to die to keep K.rool's secrets.
"Kunning! I'm ready to talk!" said Tiny.
"Remember? It's me? But I'd assume that you finally got your binds off? I'll warn Kunning to enter with trepidation," said the kremling.
There were sounds of footsteps that were receding, so Tiny took it as he was leaving. When two sets of footsteps came back, the door unlocked.
"So I take it that you're ready to talk?" asked Kunning.
"Don't rub it in," Tiny said.
"I won't. Now tell me, how did you escape from that kremling meeting where you were slated for execution?" asked Kunning.
...
"You can roll through them?" asked Dixie as she watched Diddy roll through a lemguin.
"Of course! Isn't that obvious!" said Diddy.
"How did you figure that out?" asked Dixie.
"Kiddy told me. I didn't just take a chance like that," said Diddy.
Diddy rubbed his hands together.
"This sure beats having no gloves at all!" said Diddy, "Cantankerous was awfully generous giving us these thick, woolen gloves!"
"They're much better than the pair Wrinkly gave me. Much more utilitarian," said Dixie.
"Nice word!" said Diddy.
"I say it all the time," said Dixie.
Diddy raised an eyebrow.
"Anyway, one thing that's been bugging me, Diddy, is how Bramble grows her plants in the Misty Mountains. She can't fit them all in her house. So how does she do it?" asked Dixie.
"A greenhouse?" Diddy said.
"I don't think so. Greenhouses take warm air out of the air. In these temperatures, there is not enough!" said Dixie.
"Well, then I'm stumped," said Diddy, "Wait, how about a cold frame?"
"That generates even less heat!" said Dixie, "Nope."
"Maybe she has fewer plants than she used to," Diddy said.
"Maybe you're right," said Dixie.
"Penguin Panic starts here," said Diddy pointing to the sign, "What does that mean?"
"That sign could signify the start of the level. Or be a joke," said Dixie.
The two apes looked around. They saw nothing. And there was certainly nothing that they should be panicking about.
"Should we proceed?" asked Diddy.
"I suppose so," said Dixie.
"Maybe the danger hasn't spawned yet? That would sort of make sense," said Diddy.
"I think we can deal with anything that comes," said Dixie.
"We can?" Diddy said, laughing.
"Of course!" said Dixie taking a step forward.
"I'll follow you then," said Diddy slapping Dixie in.
Dixie started walking forward. As she walked uphill, she started slipping and sliding.
"It's way more slippery than before! It's like the kremlings polished this smooth," said Diddy.
Suddenly, lemguins in the hundreds started diving down the slope.
"It was a trap! What do we do?!" exclaimed Diddy with fright.
Dixie looked around. Everywhere around them, lemguins were sliding at high speeds toward them. But a toboggan was at their right.
"That couldn't have been there before," said Dixie.
"What wasn't?" Diddy said.
"That sled," said Dixie.
"That must be our way out!" Diddy said.
"Against this threat! It can't be nearly fast enough!" said Dixie.
"Then it's my escape!" said Diddy, his voice clear with excitement.
"What? Diddy! Where are you going?" asked Dixie.
"Out of here!" said Diddy.
Diddy hopped in and looked behind him at Dixie. The sled seemingly was waiting for Dixie, as it set off as soon as she jumped into it directly in front of Diddy. The sled mechanically twisted and started charging the lemguins.
"What?" Diddy said, "You're going the wrong way, sled!"
The sled obviously didn't care. As it was barreling towards the lemguins, it now did the opposite of Diddy's well-meaning advice. It accelerated.
"Turn about! You're going to get smashed by lemguins like a ship on rocks!" yelled Diddy.
"I don't think the sled can hear you, Diddy," said Dixie.
Dixie, in fact, was enjoying herself.
"...Smashed to pulp...Completely decimated..." Diddy said.
Or at least that's what Dixie heard.
"Turn around!" yelled a lemguin.
"Out of the frying pan! And into the fire!" yelled another Lemguin.
Diddy picked up on the hints.
"What are you fleeing from?" asked Diddy.
"Mr. X!" said a third lemguin.
"And a krazy, sleep-deprived snowman!" said a fourth.
...
"Kunning, this is the box. What are you planning to do with that thingamajig that you're holding? I don't think it kan open the box for you. I kan have some kremlings unwrap it for you," said Klank.
"I'm using this device to see if it contains a bomb or any other explosive device. In other words, this could be a massive device set to blow up the entirety of Kremkroc Industries in one go," said Kunning.
"A bomb?!" Klank said.
"I'm thinking the best way to have the bomb trigger is to use a photovoltaic sensor. That way, the bomb only triggers when the sensor is exposed to light. Klank, where did you go?" asked Kunning.
"He went that away," said Klomp who was guarding the door.
"Where was he heading?" Kunning asked.
"I don't know, Kunning," said Klomp, "It probably had something to do with your birthday present."
"How did you know it was my birthday?" asked Kunning.
"Lucky guess. I think that Klank is probably getting something to identify what it is," said Klomp.
"Klomp, I'll have you walk away. I'm going to laser a hole in the box to see if I can identify the components. The results were inconclusive. I was able to identify that it was probably a machine. It's made of metal. I just can't tell if it's a bomb," said Kunning.
"I'm going to stick around with you," said Klomp, "If that thing goes off, I don't stand a chance no matter where I am," said Klomp.
"Ok, just be careful," said Kunning.
Kunning used his portable laser to remove part of the packaging.
"It's made of metal. As expected. I'm going to look closer," Kunning said, "There's an electrical panel here."
Suddenly, the loudspeakers around Kremkroc started blaring a warning.
"KODE PURPLE! TOXIK WASTE ABOUNDS!"
Then Klank's voice rang out.
"It's not kode purple! It's kode orange! Nuklear threat!" said Klank.
"Sorry. KODE ORANGE! BOMB SKARE AT FACILITIES! FULL EVAKUATION MANDATORY!"
A general pandemonium started to arouse outside of the building. Typical signs of pandemonium started to run by windows as well. People were running, wheeling carts, etcetera.
"This is bad," said Kunning.
"I FORGOT! REMAIN KALM!" said Kalculator, who was operating the loudspeakers, "Did I forget anything, Klank?"
"I think you're good," said Klank, "Since I am the highest ranking here excepting Kunning, I'm going to hit the button to put Kunning's office and laboratory underground in a bunker encasement."
"Klank, are Konstrukt and Skholar gone?" asked Kalculator.
"They're on different missions. I think Konstrukt is over in K.rool Kaves. If I remember korrektly, Skholar is on some sort of black-ops mission," said Klank.
"And now you're going to want me to tell you the kode to initiate that emergency protokol to bunkerize Kunning's stuff," said Kalculator.
"I forgot! What's the kode?" asked Klank.
"8-4-9-3-2-1-5-7-3-4-6-2-3-9-0-2-5-9-4-0," said Kalculator.
"Thanks!" said Klank.
"Kalculator should really remember to turn off the loudspeakers. Klomp, that was classified information," said Kunning, "Forget it."
"Sir, I stopped listening as soon as I heard he was going to say the kode," said Klomp.
"Good," said Kunning, "I'm going to have quite a mess to clean up."
Hours later, after the entirety of Kremkroc had emptied except for Kunning and Klomp. And after Kunning and Klomp got everyone back, Kunning almost died by stepping into nothingness instead of his office which was five miles below. And after Kunning had got his office reorganized. Kunning received a call.
"K.rool! How are you doing on this fine day!" asked Kunning.
"Great! Did you get your birthday present?" asked K.rool.
"Oh, you mean the bomb scare?" asked Kunning sarcastically.
"Oh! That! I heard about that! I hope it wasn't too diffikult to reorganize," said K.rool.
"Oh, it wasn't," Kunning said, still sarcastic.
"Kunning, I'm sorry," said K.rool, "I should've sent word ahead of time. Instead of leaving a forty-foot package at your front door."
"You know what, K.rool, I believe that is the first time I have ever heard you apologize. Thank you. And by the way, it was forty-one feet," said Kunning.
"It was?" K.rool said, "Did you aktually open it?"
"Way after the fact. I'm not the one who thought it was a bomb, K.rool, just so you know. Thanks for giving me KAOS," said Kunning.
"No problem! It was the least I kould do! I figured that you kould fix up KAOS and make some improvements," said K.rool.
"Thanks for the thought," said Kunning.
"Just so you know," K.rool said, "I would like to test out KAOS when you're done with him."
"Sure!" said Kunning.
...
"Kleever!" Mr. X thundered.
"Arf! Arf! Yip! Yip! What is it, boss?" Kleever said, zooming over to Mr. X's seat.
"Shut up, you fool."
"Awoo!" said Kleever dismally.
"Send a message to Kunning that says this. I quit! I am ready to akkept your offer, Kunning! I am tired of K.rool. He promised me absolute viktory! This is a long fall from when I was the leader in the great war. He promised me komplete triumph with the armies he provided to me. K.rool provided me with losers. My army is destroyed, K.rool despises me, I have been beaten, and K.rool has failed me," said Mr. X.
"Got it, boss!" said Kleever.
...
Kunning woke up in the middle of the night. He found himself at his desk. In front of him was the machine he had been working on before he fell asleep. He'd been dreaming of Cranky taking on Klubba. Klubba had had ice molded into the shape of boxing gloves as boxing gloves, and Cranky had been tossing animal buddy barrels at Klubba. Neither side had really made any headway by the time he had woken up.
"I'd assume, that in the end, Cranky would certainly lose in real life," said Kunning.
Kunning now turned his thoughts to what woke him.
"What woke me up? Surely, it couldn't be that crazy cat clawing at the door again," Kunning said putting on his nightcap.
It came again. Three short furious knocks. This was followed by long heaving pounds on the door.
"Who is it at this hour?" Kunning asked himself.
Kunning cleared his throat. And then he turned on the overhead light and switched off the lamp that had been on previously.
"Who is it?" asked Kunning, "Be it kong or kremling stop your banging! You're about to rouse the whole neighborhood! I'm coming as fast as I can!"
"It's neither! It's me, Konstrukt! I wasn't the one knocking, though. It was this Klinger and Kutlass!" said Konstrukt.
"Kunning, if you don't know, Konstrukt is a turtle!" said Kutlass.
"I think I know that," said Kunning chuckling.
"Sorry for the damage I did to your door, sir," said Kutlass.
"It was due for repair anyway," said Kunning.
"Since when?" said Konstrukt.
"Oh," said Kunning, "Since yesterday."
"Is that cat back?" asked Konstrukt.
"No," said Kunning, "It was the other Kutlass that came over."
"There was another one that inflicted damage to your door?" asked Konstrukt.
"Konstrukt," Kunning said, "Don't worry about it."
Kunning opened up the door and examined the slash marks.
"It covers up perfectly what the other Kutlass did!" said Kunning.
Konstrukt, Klinger, and Kutlass walked in. Kunning motioned for them to sit on the couch.
"So, what's the problem?" asked Kunning.
"I can't tell you the problem, Kunning. These two fellers pounded on my door and told me there was an emergency. They then said that Kunning needed to know about it at once. I suggested to them to tell me what was the matter first, and if necessary, relay the matter to you," said Konstrukt.
"Sorry, sir, for waking you up in the middle of the night," said Klinger.
"Don't worry about it! I'm not offended. You did the right thing! But I have no doubt that Konstrukt could resolve this issue by himself. Whatever it is," said Kunning.
"We were patrolling your experimental bonus rooms. And on one rotation, they were all stars. The next time round, they had turned into Khristmas ornaments!" said Kutlass.
"What did we mess up? Please don't kill us!" said Klinger.
Kunning started to laugh. And it was a while until they were able to get anything else out of him.
"First of all, why would I kill you? I'm not K.rool," said Kunning, "The sekond is, why would I kill loyal kremlings?"
"I think someone pulled a prank. It's Dekember 1st. Isn't that Dekember fool's day?" asked Konstrukt.
"I have no idea," said Kunning, "But I was planning to experiment with that kheat kodes. It seems that someone beat me to it!"
"Weren't you planning to do the same thing on Christmas?" asked Konstrukt.
"Maybe I was," said Kunning, "Konstrukt, I haven't heard from Skholar recently. Have you heard from him? I heard that he was actively working on the animal barrels experiment. That, and the Compound 1080 experiment."
"I haven't heard from him for a while, Kunning," said Konstrukt, "But the last time I saw him, he said that the animal barrel experiment was going well. Oh! He did say that he found an interesting phenomenon with the Compound 1080 experiment. Something he wanted to show you. Something about your specialty mining equipment not being able to incinerate some kinds of minerals. This could be potentially helpful to save some items from destruction."
"I'll check in with Skholar in the morning. Many thanks for the updates, Konstrukt," said Kunning.
"You're welcome," said Konstrukt.
"If you three don't mind, I'm going to head back to sleep," said Kunning.
"Fine by me!" said Konstrukt, "Later, Kunning!"
Konstrukt hopped on his hoverboard and flew out the door. Kutlass and Klinger followed. Before any of them were clear of the door, a buzzing sound arose.
"What's that?" asked Klinger.
"A red alert by the sound of it," said Konstrukt.
"You're right, Konstrukt. I was going for a purple alert. Which is toxic chemicals, but it sounds more like a red alert," said Kunning.
"What do you think it's about?" asked Konstrukt.
"In my opinion, the most likely cause is that K.rool has set off a national alert. This is probably because of Minkey allying with Manky Kong, and Swoopy changing to the kongs side," said Kunning.
"Or maybe something has happened within Kremkroc," said Konstrukt.
"Just as likely," said Kunning.
"If you're right, Kunning, K.rool didn't need to send out a national alert," said Konstrukt.
"Of course, he didn't! But when has K.rool ever been reasonable?" asked Kunning.
"Never," said Konstrukt, "Kunning, as the administrator of the facilities, it's your responsibility to figure out the cause."
"Too bad! And just when I was going to sleep!" said Kunning.
When Kunning had reached his main office, he picked up the walkie-talkie off the desk. He turned to K.rool's channel, and K.rool's voice started coming out of it.
"Kunning! Are you there? Pick up!" said K.rool.
"I'm here, K.rool! What's the issue?" asked Kunning, "Please tell me you turned down the sirens above your office."
"I didn't," said K.rool, "I moved offices! I put that Kuchuka that insulted me the other day in there. Serves him right! He thought he kould spite me the other day."
"Is he ok?" asked Kunning, "I wouldn't be surprised if he has long-term hearing loss."
"Also, the air-raid siren kaught on fire!" said K.rool.
"It what?" asked Kunning.
"It ignited!" K.rool said.
"I knew what you said. I just didn't understand. How did it catch on fire," asked Kunning.
"The arson inspektor said that he'd inspekt it in the morning. Kurrently, a team of kremlings is working to put it out. The real reason I set off the alarm was that Mr. X has been defeated by the kongs!" said K.rool.
"Along with his dragon?!" said Kunning.
"And Kleever as well," said K.rool.
"This is a devastating blow! I assumed that the kongs would've taken a break before pushing into the Misty Mountains. It's a fool's errand to traverse those desolate peaks in the winter. But they did it. And I think it's quite a feat!" said Kunning.
"Well, they did! I should've paid more attention to Bleak! He warned me that the kongs passed through Lemguin Luge and were koming for Mr. X! But I haven't believed that snowman ever since he said that he had almost defeated the kongs, killed them I mean, and he said that they had just vanished! And they had beaten him! I thought he had gone nuts! Maybe he had some sort of temporary insanity. I should start trusting him more. He's been right about two krucial pieces of information now!" said K.rool.
"I've been investigating that mystery ever since it happened. The best I can do at explaining it is that they paused the stage as soon as they were kicked out for the death penalty. The game probably registered something along the lines of a start+select and considered the stage beaten," said Kunning, "Does that help?"
"If anything it makes it even more konfusing," said K.rool.
"I suppose that it's one of life's great mysteries," Kunning said, "What happened to the dragon?"
"The dragon? Glaurung? At least, that's what I think his name is. He sent me a message from Mr. X. The letter explained that Mr. X and his stronghold were being overrun. I sent a zinger to survey the site a few hours after Glaurung left. It was ransacked. Burning to a krisp. Zinger almost passed out in the air from the smoke koncentration. The images that he kollekted made it look like it got nuked! If Glaurung hadn't sent a message, we'd not know for a while!" said K.rool.
"Did someone say my name?" asked a gigantic eye in front of K.rool's window.
"No, Chrysophylax, I didn't!" said K.rool sounding thoroughly annoyed.
"Who's that?" asked Kunning.
"Nobody," said K.rool.
"I swear I heard someone say my name!" said Chrysophylax.
"For the last time! Stop bugging me!" said K.rool.
"If that's your mood. I'll leave," said Chrysophylax.
"What's the story with him?" asked Kunning.
"The dragon? His best friend, some Farmer Giles of Ham, died. He's been wandering since," said K.rool.
K.rool looked around the room for something to chat about.
"Did you hear about the Minkeys and Swoopies?" asked K.rool.
"Yes, I did," said Kunning.
"These are the first desertions," said K.rool.
"I don't think they are desertions is the right word," said Kunning.
"Turnkoats, then? These are the first turnkoats since the Kremean War," said K.rool.
"You're forgetting Manky Kong," said Kunning.
"I deliberately left him out. Bekause he is the perpetrator of all of this rebellious nonsense," said K.rool.
"And Rattly," said Kunning.
"Him, I did forget," said K.rool.
"K.rool, I think everyone has gotten the point. Could you turn off the national emergency alarm?" asked Kunning, "It's bothering everyone."
"Krimp! Tell the operators of the sirens to turn it off!" said K.rool.
"Arf Arf! Got it, Kaptain! Awoo!" said Krimp.
"Since when have Krimps acted like dogs?" asked Kunning.
"Since now," said K.rool, "Some nutter of a Kobble kame up with the idea."
"One more question, K.rool, while I have you on the line, you kidnapped her and didn't tell me if she was safe," said Kunning.
"Who's she?"
"You know who I'm talking about. The Queen of the Banana Goldus Flutteruses. Flutteruses? Flutterusi? Flutterui? Flutteri? What's the plural?" asked Kunning.
"Who again?" asked K.rool, quite innocuously.
"The Queen of the Banana Birds," said Kunning through gritted teeth, "K.rool, this is not an encrypted connection. You should be careful what you say here."
"Fair enough. But, oh! That! I have several kremlings aktively monitoring her. Her behavior is kurrently very abnormal kompared to that dokument you gave us," said K.rool.
"Which would explain the random weather and the F5 tornadoes spawning instantaneously around DK Island," said Kunning.
"Did she kause it?" asked K.rool.
"No, but the source of her power, the heart of Terra Incognita, is being tampered with," said Kunning.
"By who?" asked K.rool.
"It confirms my suspicions that Krusha is actively manipulating the output. Among other things," said Kunning
"I thought your scientists were in kontrol of that area?" asked K.rool.
"Krusha evicted them and invaded Terra Incognita a long time ago," said Kunning.
"This sounds bad," said K.rool.
"I expected worse," said Kunning.
"Like what?" asked K.rool.
"Landslides, hurricanes, massive climate shifts, earthquakes, among other things," said Kunning, "But we were lucky."
"It still sounds bad," said K.rool.
"It is bad," said Kunning.
"The worst thing is that Mr. X has been defeated. One of the four pillars of the Kremling Empire has been toppled!" said K.rool.
"That's what you're calling it now?" asked Kunning.
"Yes. What else would you kall it?" asked K.rool.
"I don't know," said Kunning.
"This is all the more reason to wage an all-out war with the kongs! No more waiting for them to chip away at us!" said K.rool.
"I still insist that once you kidnap the rest of the kongs and hold them hostage. Undoubtedly, they will submit as soon as that happens!" said Kunning.
"What about the banana hoards?" asked K.rool.
"I heard that the last ones are hidden behind waterfalls," said Kunning.
"That narrows things down a bit," said K.rool.
"The Kongs have had several banana hoards ever since you stole them. They're all behind waterfalls! Anyway, when's the last time you've heard from the ships that headed to the Kongo Jungle?" asked Kunning.
"Like never! I should resolve that! I've got to go!" said K.rool.
"Ok, goodbye," said Kunning.
"Bye!" said K.rool.
Kunning turned around and saw that Skholar was sitting in front of his desk. Skholar was apparently attempting to juggle thirty to forty multi-colored balls. It was not working.
"Kunning! My formula for juggling should allow me to juggle thirty-two balls at once! It's not working!" said Skholar.
"You just need more practice," said Kunning.
"But I was waiting for you to finish. Here, look at this," Skholar said as he handed Kunning a lump of rock.
Kunning weighed it with his hand. Based on its weightiness of it, combined with its color and properties, Kunning concluded it was gold.
"This is pure gold, isn't it?" asked Kunning.
"Nope! In this kase, it's kopper soaked with Compound 1080! It formed an enamel upon it! I've tried it with several other heavy metals with the same result! It forms a shell that makes it indistinguishable from gold!" said Skholar.
"Wow! This could be the discovery of the century!" said Kunning.
"Mr. X also wants to ally with you. Kleever delivered a message. But it wasn't in Mr. X's handwriting," said Skholar.
"Mr. X can't write," said Kunning, "Or read for that matter."
"So that was Kleever's handwriting?" asked Skholar.
"Supposedly," said Kunning, "Combined with that information, I have a plan brewing."
...
"The Kommander approved the mission, Krook! He's all in! He's as bored as we are! There's an offensive planned for next week! All available kremlings are to be mobilized for the obliteration of the Kong strongholds in the Kongo Jungle! Additionally, an elite detachment will be deployed to annihilate the Manky Kongs that are holding the temple of Inka Dinka Doo!" said Kaboing.
"You did all of that without getting killed?!" said Krook, "I was konvinced that the Division Kommander would have your head for such blatancy!"
"He didn't! The general mobilization starts in fifteen minutes! Let's go!" said Kaboing.
...
DK and Kiddy woke up in a dungeon.
"This isn't good," said DK.
Kiddy eyed the bread and water in front and said, "We'll starve on bread!"
"Hello, you two," said Kunning, "I think you're wondering why Tiny betrayed you."
"I completely forgot about that! I was wondering why!" said Kiddy.
"I'll explain it to you," said Kunning.
...
"So Tiny is a double agent?" asked DK, "Spying for us on K.rool and against us?"
"Exactly," said Kunning, "She gave you up to K.rool to not lose her deep connections in the kremling government. She's now a triple agent. She's now spying for me as well. And she will not give any critical information up to K.rool anymore."
"Sounds like a good deal!" said Kiddy, "Why are we in here?"
"I can't just let you go," said Kunning, "That would raise the suspicions of K.rool."
"Then what?" asked DK.
"Tiny's supposed to break you out in a couple days," said Kunning.
"K.rool won't be surprised. He knew it would happen eventually. He actually allowed it. Because otherwise, the Kongs might get suspicious!"
"Tiny's been leading us around in circles for years," said DK.
"Indeed," said Kunning.
"Do we get more than bread and water?" asked Kiddy.
"Sure! What do you want?" asked Kunning.
"Strawberries! And celery!"exclaimed Kiddy.
"That's right! They have some nutrients that only you know about!" said Kunning.
"Some bananas would be nice," said DK.
"I can deliver on both!" said Kunning.
"Are we in the Haunted Caves or Kremkroc?" asked DK.
"Kremkroc, of course!" said Kunning, "Why would I get any control of how you're treated anywhere else?"
...
The offensive failed. Some supernatural lightning bolts decimated the Kremling Kommandos that raided the sacred temple. The Kongs sniped at the kremling regulars that were heading towards the Kongo Jungle. In the end, the force of 300 kremling kommandoes was gone, and half of the 800 kremling regulars were casualties. Operation Cape Claw had failed. Miserably. Meanwhile, K.rool had an offensive plan that he was building with his lead general. General Klump. Who is infamous for actively making things worse. Or at least in cartoons. The tactical genius Captain Scurvy had been passed over several times, and one of the best in the kremling army wasn't participating in the plans.
"I say that we send our whole army on the plateau in between the beach and the Misty Mountains," said General Klump.
"Doesn't that leave our flank and our supply lines open? And cede the high ground?" asked K.rool.
"You asked for the most efficient and direkt plan," said General Klump.
"Should we bring Kaptain Scurvy to help? I hear he's pretty smart at this stuff," said K.rool.
"Nah! He's a fool. Always has been," said General Klump.
"If you say so," said K.rool.
"So, as I was saying, you bring another force through the Misty Mountains," said General Klump.
"In the middle of winter?!" said K.rool.
"Of kourse! My troops kan handle harsh environments! The Kongs won't see it koming!" said General Klump, "They merge in the midst of the Kongo Jungle assailing it from opposite direktions! The Kongs will be held up by one force on one side of the Kongo Jungle. When they are all koncentrated on the side of the force that isn't going through the mountains, which will arrive quicker, the mountain force sweeps in from the other direction. Burning and pillaging all the way! It's foolproof!" said General Klump.
"This doesn't sound good," said K.rool.
"Didn't you say that the Southern Kremispheres has been mostly won! And that a force of five thousand kremlings is koming to support the kremlings that are already here," said General Klump, "That force of five thousand kan go through the mountains. The other two thousand that you're sending already kan go through the plains."
"You're sending soldiers that are koming from a tropikal place to an icy, desolate environment?!" said K.rool.
"A great idea, right?" said General Klump.
"No!" said K.rool.
"Either way, I have an idea for the operation name! Operation Snowhorn Wastes!" said K.rool.
"Is it just me, or are all of the operations that are going on these days named after lokales in Dinosaur Planet!" said K.rool.
"No, I koined that myself!" said General Klump.

Hope these are still great! My writing skill is not amazing, but I consider it ok. I think it's good for a kid, though. :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » March 20th, 2023, 6:32 am

Your stories are always entertaining, Tanager, even if I don't fully understand everything about them. Maybe I'll write another one of my own later on, but for now, thanks for sharing this with us.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby WesternTanager794 » March 20th, 2023, 12:08 pm

What do you want me to explain to you about? Is it because these chapters are released so far apart. Or is it that I haven’t explained stuff? :parry:
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 127
Posts: 2392
Joined: 2022

Re: DKC Fanfiction - tell us a story!

Postby Super Luigi! » March 21st, 2023, 12:04 pm

Your stories are very detailed, and it can be hard to follow the several different stories happening at once. That's not your fault, however, and I really like how much attention you give everything. If this explanation still doesn't make sense, please let me know. Thank you.
Sage of Discovery
Bananas received 301
Posts: 3697
Joined: 2012

PreviousNext

Return to DKC Projects/Fanworks

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 15 guests