Donkey Kong World

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Donkey Kong 64
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Donkey Kong Country 2:
Diddy's Kong Quest
Donkey Kong Country 3:
Dixie Kong's Double Trouble
Donkey Kong Land
Donkey Kong Land 2:
Diddy's Kong Quest
Donkey Kong Land 3:
Race Against Time
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Cranky's Family Album

Hey, there, young whippersnapper! This is the Kong Family Album! What's that? You have no interest in looking at stupid pictures! Why you!! What? You want to play Poke-what? Dadburn it, put down that yellow bunny and pay attention! I've gathered all the facts on all the members of the Kong Family in this album, so all you fanatics out there that simply have to know everything about your favorite video game hero (mainly me) can find it all here.

Cranky Kong
Age: None of yer business!
Weight: 94 lbs
Height: 5' 7"
Eyes: Black
Appears in: Donkey Kong
Country, DKC2: Diddy's
Kong Quest, DKC3: Dixie
Kong's Double Trouble,
Donkey Kong 64

Ah! What a handsome fellow! As you know, I was an arcade star in the 1980s. Yep, those were the days. 2 bit graphics and sound, with a single button to press and a nice sturdy joystick, none of that polygonal, fully rendered, analog junk you kids have today. Back then we also had gameplay. None of that in games these days! All fancy graphics and sounds, they are, not a hint of gameplay! My grandson, Donkey, is the big star these days, but I can't see why. All he does is hang around all day with his girlfriend Candy, that annoying chimp Diddy, and that obnoxious Funky, eating bananas and downing coconut shakes. What a lazy bum! Though I wouldn't be caught dead starring in these fancy pants games, I have had a guest shot in all of Donkey's adventures, handing out my wisdom and even teaching the flea-bitten ape some new moves!

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