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All you youngsters might call Donkey Kong "cool" but all he is is a lazy bum. Heck, he's been kidnapped twice! That would never happen to me! No sirree, I have cat-like reflexes, and no villan would ever get the best of me! Donkey is the self appointed "Kong of the Jungle" and defends Donkey Kong Island and his beloved Banana Hoard against the scheming King K. Rool and his army of Kremlings. The bum is very powerful, and able to topple Kremlings with a single bounce to the head. Donkey is easily sidetracked, and is a bit clumsy, but he always comes through in the end. Donkey skyrocketed into stardom after the first DK Country game. The only reason it sold well was because of the fancy, rendered graphics. It wasn't the gameplay, that's fer sure! That's when it got out of hand, as he starred in many other games after that, including co-starring with that plunger-headed Mario in a few "multi-player" games! Multi-player! Bah! In my day, you were lucky if you could have two joysticks on one machine, never mind four! And after merely having guest shots in the other two Country games, he's finally got a playable role in Donkey Kong 64, which is the most unimaginative name I've ever heard. The only thing imaginative about that game is the gameplay, because there isn't any!
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