3.27.00 11:00 am ct No Updates
I apologize for no updates. I am still taking emails, so send in any questions you may have.

3.2.00 11:00 am ct Pokemart
The Pokemart has been updated, and you can also preorder a little game called "Perfect Dark". I don't know if anyone's heard about it, but anyway...

3.2.00 3:00 pm ct Everyone Needs A Break
Wow! That took a long time, didn't it? Sorry for the long wait, but there is just NO DK news out there. So until there is more info on the new Gameboy game, updates are going to be pretty stagnant. There is a new section, the High Score Arena. Send in your best scores and/or times for DK64 and its minigames. No cheating! I'll know if a time you submitted is impossible!
Updated --> High Score Arena
Quote of the Update --> "Let me show you how to use your instrument." Candy Kong, in DK64.

2.17.00 10:00 pm ct Rest in Peace
Why update today? Because I love you... in a plutonic sense. I added another new section, Enemy Atlas, which contains all the enemies from the DK series... there is just no DK news out there. So... time to launch a high scores section! Yes, send in your best times for completing the game at 101%, by taking a snapshot of your TV screen, then scanning it and sending it to me (in a .jpg or .gif format, please). I will post the top ten times in a High Scores area in the future.
At this time I would like to send out my condolances to the family of Charles Schulz, the creator of "Peanuts", who died late Saturday night. He was possibly the greatest cartoonist of all time, and the reason I wanted to get into cartooning myself.
Updated --> Enemy Atlas
Quote of the Update --> Our DNA likes the TNA." Finch, decribing how men are attracted to women, on Just Shoot Me

2.7.00 10:00 pm ct I Feel #Blue
As I promised, I still got some tricks up my sleeve. The newest section is Cranky's Family Album. Here you can read up on each member of the Kong Family, from Cranky's perspective, of course. There is also a new Chat Room, called Channel Blue, so you can chat it up with fellow DK maniacs. Keep the language down, though, or you'll be kicked out. I have a new affiliate, Rareweb, so be sure to check them out. But come back after you do! ;) My editorial, Rare Babes, is also up. It talks about how many of the women characters Rare creates are rather, erm... well, just go and see it. Also, some sites have been reporting on the new DK Gameboy game, and have been showing the photos of them. But the screenshots they show are just the shots from the Japanese version of DKL3, which just happens to be enhanced for GB Color. We reported on that months ago (see News Archives).
Updated --> Cranky's Album, Editorial
Quote of the Update --> "Eat munchy, crunchy, chocolaty cocoa death, Crow!" Tom Servo, engaged in a dog fight with Crow, on Mystery Science Theater 3000.

2.2.00 10:30 pm ct Pump It Up
Well, I changed the splash page for Valentine's Day, so be sure to peek at it if you sneaked in another way. I've also added some more Fan art, and I've remixed Funky's Boom Box to include some better music. I haven't had time to draw up any new maps, so you'll have to wait a while for more. I'm also working a few more features that I won't mention just yet. In other news, NDK64 has a message for you fans who have been wondering where they heck they've been. There is also a brand spankin' new edition of Soundoff. Look for more maps soon and an in depth article titled, Rare Babes. Stay tuned.
Late Breaking News: The GB Camera option for Perfect Dark has been removed, but the rumored Co-Op mode has been added. The Camera option was removed for moral reasons, due to recent school gun violence.
Updated --> Boom Box, Downloads, Soundoff
Quote of the Update --> "Shut up you bastard!.... who is fat...." Austin Powers, to his enemy Fat Bastard

1.29.00 11:00 pm ct I'm Baaaack!
I know its been a while since my last real update, but you can finally relax. Maps for Angry Aztec and Frantic Factory have been added, I spruced up the Links section, and fixed some broken links in the Jukebox. I've also added something I like to call Funky's Boom Box. Enjoy!
Updated --> DK64, Links, Jukebox
Quote of the Update --> Not today

1.25.00 11:00 am ct Rare's Answer to South Park
Okay, now Rare is starting to worry me. Some magazines have been bashing Rare for bringing out cutesy games like DK 64 and Banjo-Tooie. Well, Rare isn't going to take it anymore. They've taken their cutesy Conker and given him a foul mouth and a bad attitude. Don't expect the Conker's Bad Fur Day to be acceptable for the kiddies, it may even be Rare's first M title! Check out Rare's website for more info, but this might just be one of Rare's twisted British tricks. Also, in more Rare news, 4Kids Entertainment, the people behind the Pokemon anime, has signed a licensing deal with Rare, for the new and upcoming games Jet Force Gemini and Perfect Dark. 4Kids Entertainment will negotiate all licencing deals with other companies for merchandising rights. Does that mean that JFG and PD will be just as merchandised as Pokemon? Maybe...

1.24.00 4:50 pm ct Rumorz
Contrary to popular belief, I am not dead. I just haven't had anything to update. Sadly, that hasn't changed. I have a bunch of maps for the next few worlds drawn up, but no scanner to use! I've been tinkering on some new sections for the site, but I've had a lot of projects to do, so I had to push the new sections back. Hopefully I will have the maps and new sections up soon.

1.18.00 9:00 pm ct Rumorz
Cool. A bit of gossip about the new Donkey Kong GB game. Some rumors abound that the game is a 2-D version of the N64 game, and, using the Transfer Pak, you can open up the Lost World in DK64. I don't know if that's true, so please don't barrage me with Email asking me how to open up the lost world! Another rumor is that it is simply a color version of a released DK Land game. Could it be DKL3 from Japan (see news archives)? Only time will tell. Keep checking back for the latest news on the new game.
And last, but certainly not least, some rather disturbing letters in Soundoff.
Updated --> Soundoff, Links
Quote of the Update --> "Homer, that isn't God. That's a waffle the kids stuck to the ceiling!" Marge Simpson

1.14.00 9:00 am ct Weekend Update
Just some Rare news tidbits today. Banjo-Tooie, the sequel to the hit Banjo-Kazooie, is set for a summer release, so you might as well dust off your old BK cartridge so you can finally get that darned ice key! And the long delayed Conker 64 has a vague release date for "Holiday", and has changed its name once again. The new title? "Conker's Bad Fur Day". That's fine Rare, call it whatever you want. Just try to get it out sometime this year, mmmkay? And... you knew this was coming... a new Donkey Kong game for the Game Boy Color... it's coming June 26th... more info soon...

1.12.00 10:30 pm ct Update? Today?? YES!!!!!
Mmmm. Lotsa updates today. First of all, the map to Jungle Japes is up. Check it out by going into the Jungle Japes section in the DK 64 section and clicking on the View Map link in the top bar. Then, I have four pieces of Fan Art in the downloads. One is by a fellow who calls himself Donkey Kong, while the other three are from a very talented artist (insert mischeivous laughter). Take a peek in the Downloads section. I also have some cool Desktop wallpaper in the Downloads as well. It's in a ZIP file, so you'll need an UnZIP program to get it... but don't email me asking for the program! You can use Yahoo... so use it!
Updated --> Downloads, DK64
Quote of the Update --> "So which is it baby, Spitz or Swallows?" Austin Powers, to the lethal Robin Swallows, in the Spy Who Shagged Me.

1.10.00 6:50 pm ct Update? Today?? No.
I apologize for the sparse updates recently. I've been busy working on the new layout for my Pokemon Site, The Pallet Gym. Plus, I haven't had access to a scanner to scan the maps I drew, but hopefully, I will have at least the first two world maps up by the next update. Today, I have added a new affiliate... that's it.

1.7.00 9:30 am ct Hi
Small update today. I just added a few more things to the downloads section. Um. That's it.
Updated --> Downloads
Quote of the Update --> None

1.4.00 4:20 pm ct Alas, poor, NDK64, I knew him well...
I've taken the results of the walkthrough poll. 32% of you wanted maps, while 29% of you... didn't even know we had a walkthrough. So I'm working on penning some maps for you. I should have Jungle Japes and Angry Aztec maps up soon. Also, some sad news. NDK64.com, one of the biggest DK sites on the web, will be closing... but only for a few days (or weeks). They have become so popular, their hosting service is booting them out because they're dragging down the bandwidth. So, they are looking for a new home. Fortunatly, they've already been discussing a deal with another server, so we should expect their warped sense of humor back online in a short time.
Quote of the Update --> "Why won't you go home? Are you too good for your home? Answer me!!" Adam Sandler, to his golf ball, in Happy Gilmore

1.1.2000 11:30 am ct Sigh...
Well I'm kinda disappointed. With all the panic surrounding the coming of the year 2000, I expected worldwide armagedon, but... nothing. Just a bunch of people with hangovers this morning. Oh, well, at least the site is still up! The Links have been updated with sites we hope are still around, and you can check out the lastest edition of Soundoff! Happy New Year! In the meantime, you can practice writing 2000 instead of 1999, and trying to figure out how to abbreviate the number 2000. The 00's? Hmmm...
Updated --> Soundoff, Links
Quote of the Update --> "We aren't heading toward an apocolypse! We've been living in one and we didn't even notice!" Lewis Black

12.28.99 7:00 pm ct Y2DK
As you're reading this, we are hurtling towards the year 2000. You know what that means... computer glitches, worldwide panic and the end of civilization as we know it... well, maybe not... But it does mean that I beefed up the downloads with tons of new images just for you, as well as some new webpage wallpaper. Check it out... now! Be sure to vote in the poll to the right and let me know what you think of the DK64 walkthrough. And I might just still have a few treats up my sleeve as we enter the next millenium... but the new millenium actually starts in 2001, but everyone just seems to ignore that...
Updated --> Downloads, Links
Quote of the Update --> "You know, I have almost no respect for pumas now. I know now that if I ever run into one, I can just push it the hell over." Crow, watching the stinker Puma Man, on Mystery Science Theater 3000

12.26.99 7:30 pm ct Colorful Kongs
Hmm... second update in one day within an hour of the last one? Strange, ain't it? Well, there's good reason for it. I just came upon a disturbing bit of info. Consider this: When we finally got Pokemon Yellow over here a few months ago, it was compatable with GB Color while the Japanese version, which was released several years earlier was not. Well, consider this their revenge. Our friends across the ocean are finally getting Donkey Kong Land 3... but in color! Yes, that's correct, the Japanese of Donkey Kong Land 3 (or as they call it, Super Donkey Kong Land 3), will be optimized for GB Color! No doubt they'll have an easier time seeing the game than we will, but you can take small comfort that we get Rare games before they do :) If you feel like drooling over some pics, just click the screenshot above. Does this mean that a color re-release of the DKL series here in the states is coming? Stay tuned...
Man, first the DK card game and now this...
Updated --> DK 64, Links
Quote of the Update --> "Ho ho ho!" Santa Claus

12.26.99 6:30 pm ct Oops.
Leave it to me to screw something up. I forgot to put where to find the second K. Rool Pad on DK Isle in the walkthrough. It's fixed now (Only Chunky can get the Pad). I hope everyone got what they wanted for Christmas, and I hope you lucky kids who had DK64 waiting under the tree have lots of fun!
Be sure to vote and let me know what you think of the walkthrough.
Updated --> DK 64, Links
Quote of the Update --> "Ho ho ho!" Santa Claus

12.24.99 10:10 am ct He sees you when you're sleeping...
Merry Christmas!..... Eve! Be sure to leave out milk and cookies for the big guy! I'm going to enjoy my holidays by playing video games, watching some MST3K and Pokemon, and eating turkey. I've added a new section to DK64, Minigame Madness. Check it out. I'll see you guys next year, if we survive Y2K, that is!
Updated --> DK 64
Quote of the Update --> "So, no room for Bender, eh? Fine! I'll go build my own lunar lander! With blackjack! And hookers! In fact, forget the lunar lander and the blackjack! Ah, screw the whole thing." Bender, on Futurama

12.15.99 7:00 pm ct Ban all Gnawtys!
Yup, another great update! I've added lots of images to the Downloads, plus I've added the Crystal Caves to the walkthrough. I've also tinkered with the Enemy Atlas. I'm almost 101% done with the game, I'm just having trouble with my least favorite mini-game, Beaver Bother! I hate that mini-game! Does anyone else?
Updated --> DK 64, Downloads
Quote of the Update --> "Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest." Linus, to Charlie Brown, in Peanuts

12.13.99 9:40 pm ct It's in the Cards, man
Been a while, eh? Well, sorry for leaving you out in the cold. I was going to update this weekend, but after I updated last Wednesday, I went to a party and... I woke up somewhere in Utah. Go fig. After a run in with a bike gang, and hitch hiking back home, I'm finally ready to update. And what an update! I've listed all the Banana Fairy locations, and added the Fungi Forest walkthrough as well. I also have some cool letters in a new edition of Soundoff. Next time you can expect a walkthrough for Crystal Caves and possibly DK Island.
I also found out some cool stuff. You all know of the Pokemon Trading Card Game, right? If you don't, welcome back to Earth. Anyway, now get ready for a Donkey Kong version! Yeppers, they've been unleashed in Japan, but there is no word yet about a release this way. They also appear to be based on the DKC TV show, which can either be good news or bad news, depending of if you like the CGI show... Click on the DK card above for more card images.
Updated --> DK 64, Soundoff, Cards!
Quote of the Update --> "We came, we saw, we kicked its ass!" Bill Murray, in Ghostbusters

12.8.99 9:00 pm ct No Update... or is there?
Today, I've nothing new to update... wait come back! Uh.... here. Here's the walkthrough for Gloomy Galleon! Are you happy now? As long as you're still here, check this out. The Apple IMacs are very popular in Japan right now, so you can't blame Nintendo for trying to cash in on the multicolored computers. While we're getting the cool Jungle Green deck, Nintendo of Japan is releasing N64 in two IMac colors, red and blue. They will have a similar color scheme as the Imac, with a colored top and a white opaque bottom. Okay, this is in no way related to DK, but I though it was cool.
Updated --> DK 64
Quote of the Update --> "We fear change." Garth, on Wayne's  World

12.6.99 1:20 pm ct My New Friends
I added two new affiliates today, DK64 Gaming and the Donkey Kong Megasite. I suggest you go visit them, then come back, because the Frantic Factory section is complete! I've also spruced up the items and Banana Faries sections. A lot of you have been asking for me to finish up the walkthrough. Well, I'm working on it, but there's the little fact of college classes and a job that tends to come before this site.
I'm also still waiting on some fanart. Or are you still too busy playing to scribble something out?
Updated --> DK 64
Quote of the Update --> "I don't like this guy... he's too much like me!" Brock, in Pokemon

12.2.99 7:10 pm ct Chunky is still one hell of a guy
Sorry I took so long. I got caught up in a battle of Monkey Smash and well.... things kinda got outta hand... especially after the cops showed up... ahem... Anyway, I finished the Angry Aztec guide, and I've also got the first two Kongs walkthrough for Frantic Factory up as well. How's that for service? ^_- Oh, and I was looking in my mail and I discovered that I won an award from the DK64 HQ! Very groovy! Enjoy the walkthrough and for goodness sakes, post something in Studio 64!
Updated --> DK 64,
Quote of the Update --> Eh, I can't think of one today.

11.30.99 2:20 pm ct Chunky is one hell of a guy
I've tinkered a bit with the Junk Drawer, and I've also added a bit more info to the DK64 sections Enemy Atlas and Secrets. I've also added more Fairy Locations. I've also added DK and Diddy's goals to Angry Aztec, and I should have the others ready later tonight. I forgot to mention yesterday, that the Soundoff letters section was updated as well. Check it out. I also plan to beef up the downloads section. Oh, and please send me pretty drawings. Is it so hard to take five minutes away from DK64 and draw a nice picture of Chunky? Is that so hard to ask? If you don't I'll have to fill up the fan art section with my own lousy art.
Updated --> DK 64, Soundoff (yesterday!), Junk Drawer
Quote of the Update --> "This place is colder than Eva Gabbor's wig fridge." Gex, in Deep Cover Gecko

11.29.99 3:40 pm ct "Yes, Donkey Help K. Lumsy."
Well, I guess I'll get started with the walkthrough. I have the goals for  all the Kongs in the first World, Jungle Japes. I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but I just got started with the game. I've also added lots of extra stuff, including links that lead nowhere! Don't worry, they'll be filled... eventually... Expect more soon. Until then, try out Studio 64 and post questions. Maybe someone else might have the answer! Ah, and please click on the banner at the bottom of the page. If you don't, Cranky will hit you with his cane!
Oh, and one other thing. If you subscribe to Nintendo Power, and get Offer #3283, you will get a year subscription, a DK64 Players Guide, and a special edition Banana Controller, which look very cool. But you have to subscribe before the end of the year! Check out www.donkeykong64.com for more info.
Updated --> Donkey Kong 64
Quote of the Update --> "Tonight on a very special Waltons, Mary Ellen runs around in her underwear" Crow, on Mystery Science Theater

11.27.99 8:00 pm ct Mumble.....
Playing game.... incredible graphics.... awesome sound... Army Dillo boss's easier than in the demo..... got Coconut Cannon.... can't get DK Rap outta my head..... what's up with Klump's voice?... back later... update soon....

11.22.99 9:00 am ct DK-Day
Well, DK64 has officially been unleashed onto the world. If you didn't pre-order the game, good luck getting a copy. Remember, if you reserved it at a discount chain such as Target or Wal-Mart, the game won't be available until Wednesday. Specialty stores such as Electronics Boutique and Babbages have them today (but probably at a higher price). Is is worth saving a few bucks to wait a few days? Let me know your thoughts. Oh, and please hesitate barraging me with e-mail asking me where stuff is in the game! I won't be able to play it until Saturday! :( Then you can send in questions :)
Ah, yes, check out the new Poll. I'm sure this is the last DK site to get one.
Quote of the Update --> "Don't discourage him Marge! Weaseling out of things is what separates us from the animals!... except the weasel." Homer Simpson

11.19.99 10:45 am ct Waiting..........
Only a few more days until Donkey Kong 64 is released. And with that, enjoy two new sections, the Junk Drawer and DK's Many Games. The former deals with Kong related merchandise and the latter covers games Donkey has appeared in. While we're waiting for DK64 to launch, please send in all your favorite fan art or fan stories (related to Donkey Kong, of course). The best will be placed in a yet to be titled Fan Section!
Updated --> Junk Drawer, DK's Many Games
Quote of the Update --> "His coconut gun can fire in spurts; if he hits you, it's gonna hurt" The DK Rap.

11.16.99 3:30 pm ct DK64 Demo
I finally got to play the DK64 demo today, and I have to say... IT ROCKS!! Since I was the only one in the electronics department, I was able to play all three demo levels. The lighting effects in Diddy's stage was excellent, and the boss in Donkey's stage was wicked! My favorite stage was Chunky's stage, if not for anything else but to confirm that Chunky is nothing but a big scaredy-cat. I can't wait for the game to be released, which is only a few days away now! Sadly, I'll be out of town and I won't get a copy until Saturday at the earliest! Bummer... In better news, I was finally listed in Yahoo's Search engine. Weeee!
Quote of the Update --> "Poke-Mon? Isn't that the secret service's code name for President Clinton?" Jay Leno

11.15.99 12:30 pm ct Let's Get Started
Well, I have begun expanding the DK64 section. I won't have a walkthrough for a while, cause, well, the game isn't even out yet and I haven't gotten a chance to play it. But I have the cast lists and a chart of different items in the game posted up for now, as well as the story behind the game. I also have lots of new letters in Soundoff. Check them out!
Updated --> DK 64
Quote of the Update --> "I'm bigger than ye, I'm high-ah on the food chain! Get in mah bell-ahy!" Fat Bastard, to Mini Me, in The Spy Who Shagged Me.

11.11.99 4:00 pm ct Yahoo!
I just revieved an e-mail telling me that my site has been accepted to be included in the Yahoo search engine in the next few days! Excellent! I'm still ticked at them for deleting my Pokemon site from their listings though. In site news, I've added three cool DKW buttons to the links section. You can use a plain text link to link back to the page, or use one of the three cool buttons featuring Donkey, Diddy and Tiny! I've also added the DK Shop to the Poke-Mart. Ever see an actual working DK arcade machine keychain? You can find it in the DK Shop! Next week, I'm gonna start super expansion of the DK64 section. Oh, yeah! Who went and saw Pokemon: The First Movie? Did you like it or hate it? Let me know!
Updated --> Links, Pokemart
Quote of the Update --> "And I'm allergic to your whining!" Jessie, on Pokemon, to an allergic James.

11.9.99 4:20 pm ct Bashing The Kong
I picked up a copy of the latest issue of Electronic Gaming Monthly today, because they advertised an article of DK64 on the cover. It wasn't a very good article and it was very negative. EGM didn't report on anything we didn't know already, and spent most of the time badmouthing about how the game used the Banjo-Kazooie engine and blamed DK64 for the Perfect Dark delay. But the thing they complained the most about was that that the Expansion Pak was included with the game. They said most everyone has the pak now, and wouldn't want an extra EP. If Nintendo didn't pack the EP with the game, EGM would have complained about Nintendo making us make an extra purchase. They also said the EP added $20 to the total price and that it was a rip off. I've seen ads for DK64 and the price for the 256 meg game is exactly the same as I paid for Ocarina of Time last year. I guess EGM would know about rip-offs; I paid five bucks for a magazine with 3/4 of the pages dedicated to ads.
Updated --> Links
Quote of the Update --> "Whoa. I need an Expansion Pak for my brain..." Steve, on the Hot Newz video featuring DK64.

11.5.99 9:30 am ct Is anyone here?
Well, it's been five days, and I haven't gotten one letter from anyone. Is anyone reading this tripe? Sigh. In site related news, four new screenshots you won't find anywhere else in the Downloads, and I fixed the broken links to the DK64 and Poke-Mart sections. I'm also working one some desktop and webpage backgrounds. And please click on the banner at the bottom of the page at least once each time you visit. The proceeds will go to a strapping young lad who needs a new laptop! Seriously though, please click on the banner at the bottom, please, because it will fund future contests and prizes! Please feel free to E-mail me and let me know what you think of this page! I'm dying to know!
Updated --> Downloads
Quote of the Update --> "You are the Diet Coke of evil." Dr. Evil, to Scott, in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me.

11.1.99 8:00 am ct Welcome to DK World!
Welcome to the launch of Donkey Kong World! Well, that's the official name, but we (or should I say I) affectionately call it DK World. This site was actually ready over a month ago, but in the tradition of Rare, I delayed the release in order to make this site the best site possible, tweaking the graphics and the layout until it was perfect. You are probably wondering, who I am, where I came from and if I have pants on. I have had approximately two popular web sites that just happened to land on the search engines. One is Super Smash Bros. Central. The other is Josh's Pokemon Page. Unfortunately, I had to move and instead of changing the listing for the Pokemon Page, Yahoo simply deleted it. Strange fellows. It is now back up as The Pallet Gym, and you can visit both in the Links section, which I do ask (or rather, beg) you to do. But I'm getting away from the main topic and that is... MY DONKEY KONG PAGE IS FINALLY HERE!
Obviously, the main focus of this page will be the upcoming and sure to be a hit Donkey Kong 64 (and the sure to come DK64 2). But I obviously couldn't launch this page a month before the release without any content to this page. Therefore, I decided to retrieve my dusty DKC and DKL guides from my parent's old PC and remix them to incorporate them into the new site. So, now while you're waiting for me to start the Donkey Kong 64 guide, you can check out the guides for all the SNES and Gameboy forays. I'm pretty sure that this site is the ONLY site on the web where you will find a complete guide to Donkey Kong Land 3.
You can expect reliable information, up to date news and a twisted sense of humor on this site. And yes, I have pants on. You can also find hidden jokes if you look hard enough. Hey, there are two on the splash page! So look around and check it out. If you need help navigating this site, ask my little friend Lakitu who's hangin' out on the side bar. E-mail me with any thoughts, suggestions or ramblings you have and it may just be posted in the next edition of Soundoff.
Quote of the Update --> "Whoa. I need an Expansion Pak for my brain..." Steve, on the Hot Newz video featuring DK64.

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